


Yellow Blinds

by Ebraheart



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Alcohol, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Language, M/M, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Other, Recreational Drug Use, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2019-02-13
Packaged: 2019-08-25 19:23:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 34,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16666783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ebraheart/pseuds/Ebraheart
Summary: Isak is in first year university studying Bio-Chemistry. He's proud to have survived his hectic high school years, managed to keep his sanity and his close knit friends group, and presenting as an Alpha at 15 blessedly hadn't added to his worries. Now 19 and privately curious about the same sex, what happens when Isak meets Even, a second year Uni student that ticks all his boxes and instigates in Isak a biological reaction that he can't seem to get to the bottom of.My take on the Alpha Isak/Omega Even alternate universe.





	1. Blind sensation

**Author's Note:**

> https://www.flickr.com/photos/168152327@N06/32077212698/in/dateposted-public/
> 
> What they look like. Just in case the link at the start doesn't work.

Chapter one: Blind sensation

~!@!~

“Fuck!”

Isak’s exclamation startled Magnus awake and caused Jonas to give him an affronted side glance. They were meeting in the university annex just outside the library where a handful of reading alcoves for studying usually ended up packed with randoms trying to catch afternoon naps.

Magnus had the closest class and usually snagged them a spot. Madhi had a whole different schedule and had to cross too far to meet them on Thursdays and as such, wasn’t there at all.

Magnus groaned and pulled his hoodie down over his face before shuffling and trying to resuming his nap. Jonas put down the ethics textbook he was reading, “What?”

Isak chewed his lip and then groaned after double checking the notification on his phone, “My rut starts next week”

Jonas shrugged negligently, “And?”

Isak rolled his eyes, “Its midterms the week after. I won’t get any fucking studying done”

Magnus snorted and Jonas shrugged, “Get suppressants”

Isak paused. He hadn’t taken suppressants since he presented a touch early at 15 and only because he hadn’t quite got the hang of dealing with all the new hormones he’d had. He’d been lucky enough for most of his ruts to fall outside of any important or avoidable situations since then though. Isak wasn’t able to take this as lightly as he might have liked since he depended on his scholarship to facilitate his living in the shared flat with Eskild and Linn.

Isak squinted at Jonas, “Don’t I need a prescription?”

Jonas gave him another look, “The Student Health Clinic can get you stuff”

Isak mulled this over and remembered they had mentioned the Student Health Clinic in orientation but hadn’t figured he would have ever needed that information. He used condoms religiously enough and it’s not like he could get pregnant. Isak did know they were located in the admin building, in the basement of all places, and that it was manned by nurses and student volunteers. He’d briefly considered working there himself but had been dissuaded when Magnus insisted that only betas worked there and that he would have been woefully out of place as an Alpha.

Isak didn’t think he was anything like other Alphas. He was reasonably tall, but that was genetics, and he had the temper but not the brawn. Jonas was Alpha but that made sense, and Madhi and Magnus were Beta, both pretty even tempered and mild in their own ways. Isak had only ever worried about ending up Omega because his mother was one and he’d never known his father’s presentation. He’d always had the worst luck and he could recall distinctly when his world had tried, really aggressively in his opinion, to go to shit in high school when his parents had split up and his mother’s mental health had taken a nosedive. He still doesn’t know how he’d survived those times, but presenting as an Alpha had been such a relief amid a sea of drama that he’d never, ever been able to muster up any capacity to complain about it. And he could admit, never out loud but deep down inside, that he could be a bit of a complainer.

He also knew he’d better go sooner rather than later as he had to start the suppressants at least 3 or 4 days before hand for them to have time to kick in. He hadn’t been on them regularly so he knew the dose he took now would only be able to shorten his rut, but a three day rut was better, by far, than his abnormal 5 or 6 day ruts. Isak had always had abnormally long ruts, but then usually only had two or so a year, so he was also hard pressed to complain about that. Jonas had ruts every two or three months, and he’d heard the graphic details about how those were managed after Jonas and Eva had broken up. Isak knew they were still sniffing around each other, but that they were content to be friends for the time being.

Isak himself had his fair share of fooling around, but more often than anything else with Betas, and once or twice with Alpha girls. He didn’t like bragging about how his ruts went down like other Alphas but knew Magnus especially thought him to be a chick magnet. While he wasn’t known for turning his nose up at anyone who approached him, he also didn’t want to land himself in hot water. He was curious about same sex relationships, if he was honest, but while secondary gender presentation could in theory absolve a relationship with another guy of the ‘homosexual’ tag, Isak was still keeping his not-so-straight curiosity to himself. He didn’t like to think he was ashamed but it was hard not to be with the chip he already felt he had on his shoulder.

So: he agreed with Magnus when they sat in the cafeteria near West Street assessing the girls and he was a stellar wingman when Jonas was looking to hookup, and he occasionally talked style and technique with Madhi, but he never, ever let himself think too hard about the odd guy that may or may not catch his eye. In the words of Shakespeare, that way lay madness.

Isak snapped out of his musings when Jonas started stuffing his books back into his bag, “Are we going for coffee later?”

Magnus didn’t stir until Jonas playfully lifted and slammed his backpack on the table. Isac laughed when Magnus startled and banged his knee under the table. He glared at Jonas through his bangs for half a second and the laughed as well.

Isak had his afternoon labs with Sana and knew he’d be done by 4 or so, “I’m in”

Jonas waited for Magnus to collect his things, as they were headed in the same direction, “Hit up the Student Clinic and we’ll meet you by the Eastside’s”

He nodded, absently whipping Magnus in the butt with his rolled up lab notebook, and grinned at his indignant squawk, “Yup”

He ended up staying another half hour, going over the lab materials he had already reviewed twice before he left the alcove. He half jogged to his labs knowing Sana would chew him out mercilessly if he dared to be late.

~!@!~

Isak had to admit that he enjoyed working with Sana especially because they were competitive. Deep down, he didn’t think he was smarter than Sana but he knew he could give her a run for her money some days and she never backed down from a challenge. Even as partners in lab, they raced to wrap up their experiments faster than the other and be the first to finish and hand in the day’s quiz.

By the time he left Sana by her lockers in the Science building, he was half way through the middle of campus when he remembered he needed to hit up the Student Health Clinic.

The upper three levels of administration building housed half the art-fart programs, with the administrative and Registrar’s offices on the first floor. The basement had once been an old microbiology lab and had been repurposed into space for the Student Health Clinic. Isak was familiar with the layout as Jonas minored in Media Studies and he’d met here after classes a few time since start of the year. He knew the clinic was supposed to offer contraceptives and stuff like secondary gender counselling, but he’d never set foot in the place himself.

He was partway down the stairs when a tall brunette woman rushed past him. Isak thought nothing of it and pushed through the old, heavy wooden door at the bottom that had a gold plaque that listed the clinic hours and emergency contact phone numbers.

He emerged into a sort of waiting room with beige chairs and old-school moss green carpet. There was a very slightly musty smell, but it wasn’t unpleasant. Isak noted that there was no one else in the waiting room and wandered slowly over to what was obviously the reception desk. There was no one manning the station but there was a small red button proclaimed ‘Ring for Assistance’ and a bowl of multicolored condoms, so he pocketed a few and pressed the buzzer. There was a set of large beige double doors to the right of the reception desk and Isac could hear the doorbell-like chime that sounded beyond the doors. While he waited, his phone buzzed with a text.

As he glanced down and pulled his phone from his pocket, the double doors opened and he smelt, before he heard, the new person enter the room.

Isak was not one for cologne or perfumes or body sprays, despite the fact that he’d never had a sensitive nose. He’d been told on occasion, usually by girls he’d hooked up with, that he smelled good. He knew that biology accounted for the perks of secondary presentation, including and not limited to a pleasant natural musk that served to facilitate the attraction of potential mates, but Isak had never himself been on the receiving end of the phenomena. But if the automatic flutter in his gut was anything to go by, the score was now biology: one and Isak: nil.

That or it was just damn great cologne.

Isak looked up into very big, very blue eyes as the cloud of bergamot and lemongrass walked over, “Hiya”

Isak stayed mute as he took in the rest of the person: shockingly tall and willowy, with long wheat blond hair held off a high forehead by a thin pink headband; eyes crinkled nearly shut by a blinding smile that showed pointed canines inside a pair of pretty lips; and a voice that was deep and soft all at once.

Isak’s eyes dropped to the lanyard around the neck that proclaimed this vision’s name: Even.

Isak simultaneously felt like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over his head and that a fire had started in his gut and he worked very hard to make sure the chill that started at his tailbone and raced up his spine didn’t show. This guy ticked all Isak’s boxes and to say that he was probably freaked out was the understatement of the year.

Isak tried twice, unsuccessfully, to clear his throat to and answer Even’s greeting.

Even’s expression went from open and friendly to slightly concerned and he seemed to take pity on Isak, “Need to see the nurse?”

Isak looked everywhere but at Even as he nodded.

Even paused before he sat down at the desk with the ancient desktop and motioned for Isak to do the same. Sitting down, Even shrunk from a sunny palm tree into more of a glittering rose, not really less distracting but slightly less overwhelming.

Isak sat. His phone buzzed again but he hardly noticed. He was too busy watching the way Even worried the tip of his right canine tooth with his tongue as he typed into the computer.

“Been here before?”

Isak’s eyes snapped to Even’s as he tried to gauge if he was flirting or if Isak was just hearing what he wanted to. When Even’s expression stayed open and reasonably neutral, he pinched his inner forearm under the desk as self-punishment for overreacting, “N-no…”

Even nodded and looked to the computer, “So we keep everything anonymous, of course, but I just have to ask you some general questions for audit purposes, ok?”

Isak nodded and Even popped a small smile, “Age?”

“19”

Even typed, “Reason for visit?”

Isak wanted to fidget but stopped himself, “Suppressants”

Even nodded, not looking up, “Sexually active: yes or no?”

Isak was beginning to appreciate Even’s subtle way of not making eye contact while he asked the questions that were a touch more personal, “Y-yeah…sometimes. Yes”

Even squinted and typed, still worrying his tooth, “Relationship status?”

Isak shrugged negligently, “Single…basically”

Even looked up and grinned before resuming, “Aware of the necessity of practicing safe sex?”

Isak ignored the flip his gut attempted when Even had smiled, “Yup”

He popped the P a little and Even’s smile widened, “Aware of the type of services available at the Student Health Clinic?”

Isak shrugged again, “Yes?”

Even gave him a squinty look and laughed, “I’ll give you that one. Interested in being added to the mailing list for monthly updates?”

Isak paused and decided it couldn’t hurt, “Sure”

“E-mail address?”

Isak rattled off his student one and Even typed a bit more before he pulled a card out of the desk drawer and wrote a number on it, “This is your visit number. If you have to come back for any reason, just give us this card and we can slot you in without asking these questions again”

Isak nodded and Even stood from behind the desk, throwing a whiff of his awesome not-sure-if-it-was-cologne Isak’s way “So, we have one nurse on this afternoon but she stepped out ten minutes ago and should be back soon. You can take a seat”

Isak hoped his face didn’t show his disappointment at having to stop talking to Even but he stood, bunching his jean jacket and hooking his book bag in his right hand as he moved to sit in the waiting room.

He made it a few steps when Even spoke again.

“Or…” Even started, “You could hang out with me in the back?”

Isak tried not to trip over his own feet as he turned back to Even, whom shrugged with his palms up.

Isak grinned, “I wouldn’t mind that”

Even smiled back, “Ok”

Isak followed Even through the double doors and into a wide area that must have been the lab proper, way back when. The far left wall was divided into cubicle sized examination rooms and there were a few stretchers lined up and down the center of the room. Along the right hand wall, the clear glass shelving that must have once housed graduated cylinders and chemicals in storage now served as storage for medications, pamphlets, educational props, and what looked to be contraceptives.

Even motioned for Isak to sit on a stretcher while he pulled his phone from his pocket.

Isak used the opportunity to get a better look at Even.

He was wearing a very long knit grey cardigan and dark blue jeans with a white tee. Isak noted the retro colored Nike Air Max sneakers and the extra-wide strap jet black Nixon watch on his left wrist, time face on the inside of the wrist instead of facing out. Even’s hair was long in the back, curling over his ears and around the nape of his long neck and Isak could see that the pink circle headband was holding what must be very, very long bangs off Even’s face.

Isak was surprised to hear the start of music playing, low and soft.

Even set his phone down on the counter and reached over to pull a cart stacked with boxes closer to himself as he half turned to Isak, apparently to resume what he had been doing when Isak rang for assistance, “What’s your major?”

Isak watched Even’s long fingers curl around a handful of boxes as he turned and carefully placed them on a shelf with more of the same, “Bio-Chemistry”

Even whistled, low and long, “Smarty. Like it?”

Isak popped his phone out of his pocket and thumbed Shazam open, discreetly trying to record the song that Even had playing while pretending to check his Insta feed, “Yeah. I’m not regretting it yet”

Even laughed and his eyes nearly closed with his wide smile, “Science was never my best subject”

Isak glanced down at the Shazam result, ‘Honey’ by ROBYN, “What do you major in?”

Even made a show of looking surprised, his eyebrows climbing comically high, “What makes you think I’m a student?”

Isak scoffed, “You aren’t a nurse, are you?”

Even paused and very seriously replied, “That’s sexiest, you know”

Isak stopped short, not able to tell if Even was truly offended or not, and Even burst into laughter at the look of dawning discomfort on Isak’s face.

“Fucker”, Isak grumbled under his breath, noting the song had changed again to something lighter and pop-y. He Shazam’d again. Isak always felt you could tell a lot about someone by the music they listened to.

Even grinned wide, canines showing, “I’m just playing. I major in Media Studies and minor in Animation. I’ve worked here since my first year ‘cause the girls are awesome”

Isak nodded; Shazam delivered: ‘Girl of the Year’ by Allie X. He’d never heard of Allie X.

To cover what he was doing, he made of show of looking back to his chat history and saw a text that Jonas must have sent him earlier about being late to Eastide’s and a second text from Magnus stating that he’d snagged a booth and was waiting. That was ten minutes ago. Isak glanced at the time and noted he still wouldn’t be late, technically, if he was out of here in the next twenty minutes.

Absently, he put his phone back in his pocket, “Heard mostly Betas work here? That’s probably why it’s so chill”

Even froze for a moment, though Isak almost missed it, and resumed cracking open the next box of stuff, “It shouldn’t actually matter what the secondary genders are since we are all just chill people to begin with. It’s the mix of personalities that make it great to work here”

Even didn’t sound defensive, exactly, but Isak felt he had crossed a line somewhere and backpedalled, “I’m not being judgemental but there’s a reason Alphas aren’t suited to certain types of work or environments. Believe me when I say I could not see myself staying chill and dealing with other people’s stress for a living, so for me, nursing would be out”

Even took the platitude for what it was, “I get what you mean, but the reflex to assume is a bit much”

Isak looked at Even for a moment, “You are big on gender rights, aren’t you?”

Even smiled, “How could you tell?”

Isak was about to answer when the tall brunette that had passed him on his way in entered through the double doors, “Hello”

Even didn’t stop what he was doing but indicated Isak with a slight jut of his chin, “Pascal, this is Isak. Isak this is one of our nurses, Miss Pascale”

Pascale was tall and slim, though not nearly as tall as Even, and had a firm handshake when she approached Isak, “If you’ll come this way, we can have a chat and see what I can do for you?”

Isak was reluctant to leave Even’s company, though he wasn’t sure why, and followed Pascale into the first cubicle. He’d spend the next 20 minutes chatting to Pascale, who was pleasant and knowing as she step out of her office to retrieve the appropriate dosing of suppressants she had calculated based on his age and weight.

Isak found out that the Health Unit received subsidies from the government that allowed them to cover all or partial costs for contraceptives and suppressants while a student was enrolled at the university and Pascale encouraged Isak to tell his friends and let them know, if they didn’t already.

Pascale escorted Isak back to the waiting room and Isak noted that Even was nowhere in sight. He made an appointment with Pascale to check back in after his rut next week to let her know if the dosing had worked out but with no other reason to linger, Isak thanked her and made to leave.

On his way out, he caught a faint trace of Even’s bergamot and lemongrass scent on the grey cardigan he had been wearing, hanging by the door. Isak was seriously embarrassed by what he did next, but his gut told him to do it and he acted fast before his nerve deserted him.

Isak dropped his back pack and fished his spare Nike drawstring tote bag out of the bottom of his book bag. He sometime travelled light to his labs and usually used it when all he needed was his lab coat and exercise book. Isak snagged the cardigan, gut twisting pleasantly as he caught another stronger whiff of Even’s cologne, and stuffed the cardigan into his tote.

Isak had everything stuffed back into his book bag in record time and took the stairs two at time until he was safely outside. While he was capable of appreciating how creepy and inappropriate what he had just done was, a deeper part of Isak knew it would come in handy when his rut hit next week. He promised himself he would wash and return it afterwards.

And though the thought of never seeing Even again made him sad for a splint second, Isak also understood that they had met entirely by chance and therefore, shouldn’t dwell on it too much either.

Except he’d totally just appropriated the guy’s cardigan for jerk off purposes.

Isak sighed and made his way to where the boys were already waiting; hopefully, it would just sort itself out.

No going back now anyway.

~!@!~


	2. Chaos Theory

~!@!~

Chapter 2: Chaos Theory

~!@!~

[Friday]

Isak’s rut hit a little early. He was wrapping up class with Sana when he started cramping and sweating. Sana, who was also Alpha, did him the quiet curtesy of saying she’d hand in his lab paper so he could get a move on.

Isak didn’t have to be told twice.

Isak was on the bus home when he let himself think about Even’s cardigan. He’d tried not to think about it because it had been territorial and inappropriate and Isak was Alpha but never like that; never over somebody he didn’t know or had no right to be Alpha with.

Isak had always been good at pretending things weren’t as bad as they were. He sometimes had trouble being honest with himself and this situation wasn’t any different. Isak did know that regardless of how he felt about having stolen the cardigan that he was going to have to return it. Hopefully without Even ever finding out it was him.

Back in the apartment, Linn was home but likely asleep and Eskild was working.

Isak started with a shower to put the sweaty, overheated feeling at bay and double checked that he had everything he would need over the weekend. Isak’s ruts were a mix of borderline flu-like symptoms like chills, sweating, and body aches and periods of arousal so deep it was embarrassing. Ruts were a biological part of Isak’s secondary presentation that he did catch himself resenting when they were happening mostly because the needs were all consuming and common sense couldn’t prevail.

Isak knew ruts served the purpose of ensuring that a coupling between mates had a higher success rate for ending in the conception of a fetus but he resented the fact that his body reacted regardless of him being in a relationship or not. Ruts were always easier if a partner was present to share it and the body wasn’t easily fooled, no matter what temporary relief Isak usually got from masturbating.

But Isak had a plan.

He’d started the suppressants that morning and knew they were working simply because he was only half hard and already over an hour into his rut. Isak was usually painfully hard from the start and it made getting anything else accomplished impossible. He usually stocked stuff like Gatorade, jerky, and nuts as snacks and made sure to have plenty of lube or lotion and clean washcloths at his bedside. Eskild had made him an embarrassing sign to hang on his door when he was in rut and as much as he hated to use it, it was the only guaranteed way of stopping Eskild trying to inquire as to his wellbeing.

Isak cracked the window to his bedroom, even though it was starting to get chilly overnight in late September because he knew he’d appreciate it later. It helped to keep reasonable airflow in a room that would get otherwise fairly rank, fairly fast.

He debated briefly about shutting off his phone, but he was also realistic about his capacity to unplug completely, and so left it on silent instead.

Isak striped off the towel around his waist and pulled on a pair of boxer shorts, trying to be mindful of his sensitive half-chub and fell into bed. He lay quietly for a few moments, feeling the sweat gathering between his shoulder blades despite the recent shower and the prickling of his skin. He felt warm and increasingly restless but he was also tired. He wondered blearily if he could sneak a nap in and then almost laughed at himself.

He was mentally ticking through his to-do list when he again remembered his secret weapon.

Isak was ashamed of stealing the cardigan, he really was, but once he had made off with it, the guilt had died down from a roaring fire to a dull simmer. Isak knew that no matter how often Eskild nagged about the cleanliness of his room that he would never go through his things, but the afternoon he’d come back from coffee with the boys, he’d spent nearly a half hour trying to decide where to stash his contraband.

He’d eventually decided on stuffing it into his pillowcase. Isak had noticed that sleep came more easily last night, but figured it was the relief of getting himself organized for his rut just in time. The soothing smell of cologne on Even’s cardigan hadn’t hurt things either, if he was honest.

Isak pulled the pillow down from where it was wedged between the head of the bed and the wall and shoved his face into it. The smell coupled with the cool underside of the memory foam was a lethal combo and Isak did manage to nap for a short while until a surge of heat woke him and hour later and Armageddon officially began.

~!@!~

Isak spent the next three days cycling between jerking off, napping, and snacking. By noon on Saturday, he gave up pretending normalcy and buttoned Even’s cardigan around his pillow.

In his more lucid moments, Isak checked into social media. Sometime on Sunday, Isak had realized that he might be slightly obsessed with someone he knew nothing about. He learned fast that Even was either a social pariah, or a ghost. If not for knowing firsthand that Even was a real person, Isak might have though himself confused due to dehydration.

Even was not to be found on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, or Twitter, as far as Isak could figure though he could admit that he didn’t know anything discerning about Even apart from his first name. Isak got a touch desperate and even tried browsing through Tinder and Grindr, based on proximity, but ended up attracting a lot of unwanted attention. He uninstalled both apps and promptly went back to taking himself in hand, literally.

In the afternoon on Monday, Isak could tell he was winding down. He was lying on his side in a post-orgasm haze with his arm slung over his pillow when it suddenly occurred to him that he did know one other thing about Even.

Even worked at the Student Health Clinic.

Isak roused himself from a near comatose state to lean over the edge of his bed and scoop up his laptop. The university website was better browsed on a computer and had been difficult to navigate on his iPhone on a few previous unrelated attempts.

It was as easy as logging into his student inbox and clicking into the link that was at the top of the newsletter that Isak had agreed to have sent to him when he’d given Even his student e-mail.

The Health Clinic’s page was very straightforward and Isak made a beeline for the ‘About Us’ section that included information about the staff. Isak scrolled down through the pictures of the nurses and noted one of Pascale with her glasses perched on top of her head and a smile on her face, looking younger than when Isak had met her. He almost felt crushed when he neared the bottom of the page and could see he had come to the end of the staff pictures and blurbs, but then stopped cold.

At the very bottom, under a heading that read ‘Honorable Mentions/Student Mentors’ were a handful of names with no pictures or blurbs.

The second to last name read: Even Bech Naesheim.

Isak knew he was being maybe a little dramatic, but that didn’t stop the rush of relief he felt when he finally figured out something concrete about Even. Haltingly, Isak typed Even’s full name into google and waited for the handful of seconds that it took the search engine to process his request.

The link that popped up was for YouTube.

Isak paused, kind of intrigued and a lot surprised. He hadn’t thought of You tube, but then again, no one as young as Even had never had so little of a social media footprint. Isak realized early on in his stalking that this had to be intentional. There were people that couldn’t resist posting play-by-plays of their full days and people like Isak that were in it for the use of Messenger and the memes, but having zero anything posted, anywhere? There was something going on there.

There were two videos under the user name ‘Hei Briskeby’ that were public. The rest, or the majority, were private. Isak clicked on the first one titled ‘M’s Interview’ and it started with an up-close shot of Even’s face. He looked different: his hair was a lot shorter and styled up into an artful quiff and there was a cigarette tucked in behind his ear. He looked a bit younger and his expression was pure mischief.

He was moving and the camera jostled gently from side to side with his gait. Even started speaking ten seconds into the start of the video: “Today, we are interviewing my best buddy Mikael about his latest photography project”

As Even moved, he started to turn the camera and zoomed in on a guy sitting in a cabin, turned to face the window. Isak realized they were on a bus or a train. Even’s hand entered the frame and he knocked on the door. The guy turned and grinned at him: he was Moroccan, maybe, with longish hair and an easy, almost goofy expression. There was a backpack on the seat next to him and a camera on a strap around his neck. Even slid the door open, “Ready for your close-up?”

The guy, presumably Mikael, nodded, “Ready when you are, Baz”

Even kept the camera trained on Mikael as he settled in the seat directly opposite him, “Tell us about your current project”

Mikael talked for a while and Isak skipped ahead every so often, but Even never showed up on camera again though he conducted the interview for a total of about 15 minutes. Mikael was apparently doing an expose of some sort. Isak could see that it was pretty casual as interviews go; Even was making Mikael laugh quite a lot as they bantered back and forth.

Isak got bored and clicked to the next video.

It was a montage of some sort, done with pictures and the N.W.A’s ‘Express Yourself’ as background music. It seemed to go over the members of ‘Hei Briskeby’, listing them from Elias, to Yousef, to Mikael, to Adam, to Mutasim, and lastly, Even. Isak paused over the pictures of Even: one of him standing amidst the other 5 in what looked like a school yard, clearly the tallest of the bunch with Mikael and Yousef as close seconds; another looking like James Dean with dark sunglasses perched on the end of his nose, his chin in his palm and a long curl of hair falling over his forehead; and lastly, one of him standing outside in the winter with a small dog tucked up under his arm, a bandana around his neck and not wearing a jacket, his smile so wide his eyes were crinkled shut.

Isak noted that the videos were from 2015 and 2016 respectively, with the montage being the older of the two. He again noticed how different Even looked: the quiff was obviously how he used to rock his hair and there was something undeniably more macho about it versus the longer, less styled hair he had now; he’d also had a different way about him too, more cocksure and less soft then the Even Isak had met.

Isak abruptly blew out a breath and snapped his laptop shut. He wasn’t going to find anything more out about Even if the guy didn’t tell him himself.

He instead tugged his pillow to his chest and tentatively sniffed at it. The cardigan had officially lost all of the lingering bergamot and lemongrass scent. Three days of Isak huffing it like compressed air had done it.

Isak rolled onto his back, pillow-clad-in-cardigan still tucked to his chest, and starred at the ceiling.

This was either the start of the most embarrassing closet crush of all time, or Isak was literally just being a sick fuck. He couldn’t fathom which was worse, so he closed his eyes and counted sheep for a while.

He was interrupted by his rut’s last hurrah, a spontaneous boner that didn’t go down even after Isak tried to ignore it for 10 minutes. He was a sick fuck, he decided, his thoughts again sliding to Even as he shoved his hand down his shorts.

Definitely sick.

~!@!~

Wednesday started rut free and Isak decided to ignore his unhealthy fixation on the owner of a certain cardigan and dived back into student life. He headed into university that day like a man on a mission.

On the tram, he texted Jonas in the group chat about being off quarantine and immediately got a reply about going to a house party the coming Saturday night. Magnus started rehashing a weird dream he’d had the night before and Mahdi’s dry commentary had him smiling.

Wednesdays were good days because Isak had labs all day aka nothing but science. Sana’s company was exactly the kind of no nonsense he needed to help him focus and his mood actually improved when he bounced into his first class and Sana’s gave him her first irritated look of the day.

After that, Isak relaxed. He didn’t think about Even again until after lunch when he was absently browsing Imgur while he waited for Mahdi to grab them lunch and Sana sat across from him, furiously adding to their paper on pancreatic enzymes.

Sana interrupted that train of thought before it really developed, “Have you been working on your portfolio?”

Isak squinted at her over the top of her laptop, “It’s too soon to bother with that”

Sana glared at him, “Your portfolio is a reflection of both your academic standing and community ties. If you don’t start working on it, you’ll kick yourself later on. Our program doesn’t get easier, Isak”

Both Isak and Sana had chosen Bio-Chemistry as it was an ideal stepping stone degree into medicine or pharmacology. Neither of them had decided what they would ultimately go for, though Isak was privately sure they would end up picking the same thing as they were fond of playing ‘Who does it better’, but he knew that they were supposed to volunteer and make academic connections for character references that would be part of applications into the Medicine program . Sana wasn’t a ‘let sleeping dogs lie’ kind of a girl and had nagged Isak about considering where he’d like to volunteer before they’d even started University over the summer.

Madhi plopped down next to Isak, “They are having a student participation rally tomorrow. A lot of the clubs and student-run extracurricular clubs will be recruiting; Jonas was talking about joining something”

Sana gave Madhi a nod, the Sana equivalent of a shout-out, “I am going with the girls. Vilde and Eva need something to keep busy or they get into trouble”

Isak snagged his grill cheese and chocolate milk, winking at Sana, “There you go; crisis averted”

Sana squinted at him and then promptly ignored him altogether, getting back to their paper.

Sana had learned with time to delegate some of their tasks when they worked in group together but she always insisted on reviewing his work.

Madhi and Isak shared a look, communicating their amusement with regards to Sana’s endless sass, and ate quietly for a while, showing each other memes.

They were eventually joined by Jonas and Noora with Isak and Sana departing for their afternoon classes at 1:30.

~!@!~

After class, Isak had dropped Sana off at her locker, dutifully carrying both of their hefty Molecular Biology textbooks. He then headed off to the Student Health Unit. He’d made a tentative appointment to see Pascale post-rut to go over how the suppressants had worked for him.

Isak knew that the likelihood of Even being there was slim, mostly because he’d always had shit luck that way and also because the Student Health Clinic website clearly noted that student mentor facilitated hours were usually from about 6 pm to close and was primarily weekend coverage from Thursday to Saturday unless mentoring was requested by appointment. Isak had met Even there late last Thursday but was headed there now for 3:45pm. He was meeting Jonas there too after one of his Media Studies classes.

During the day the admin. Building did seem busier, what with classes on the upper floors, but Isak noted it still got quiet when he descended the stairs towards the basement. The waiting room had more going on today too. Isak noted he wasn’t the only student there, what with a pair of girls huddled in one corner gossiping in low voices and a nervous guy that seemed to be there with his girlfriend.

There was an older woman manning the reception desk with a shock of bright red hair and large, cat eye glasses. Isak starred for a minute and she looked up, “Hello! Visit number?”

Isak fished the card Even had given him out of his wallet and handed it to her. She smiled kindly at him, laying it flat on the desk before typing into the desktop, “It says here you have an appointment with one of our nurses; let me just call back and see if she’s ready”

Isak eased his back pack down off his shoulder and into the chair in front of the reception desk while the receptionist picked up a phone hidden on the other side of the desktop, “Pascale? Your 3:45 follow-up is here”

The woman listened for a moment and nodded. She hung up the phone and returned the card to Isak, “You wait right here; she’s coming out now”

As if on cue, Pascale propped the large beige double doors open and motioned for Isak to come in.

He followed her into the back room, noting that there were a lot more staff milling around. Pascale wore a lab coat with the letters RN stitched into the pocket on the top right, and Isak noted the other two nurses wore similarly identifying lab coats.

She ushered him into the same cubicle they were in last time he was here and motioned for him to have a seat, “I’m glad you came back!”

Isak dropped his bag by the chair and sat, “I had an appointment?”

Pascale, dressed in a burnt orange sweater dress and knee high boots, gave him a wide eyed look, “Do you know how many people actually come to their follow-ups? We used to make bets it was so rare”

Isak smiled at that, “It never occurred to me to ditch”

Pascale sat on her stool on wheels and held up a blood pressure cuff as she approached, “Well, I’m glad regardless. How did it go?”

Isak obligingly held out his right arm as Pascale fit the cuff on, “Basically the way I’d hoped. It was about three days. One of the easier ones I’ve had lately”

Pascale nodded and traded the blood pressure cuff for an ear thermometer, and Isak acquiesced, “You said that you don’t normally take them, but did you notice anything out of the ordinary for this rut? Anything you might not attribute to the suppressants?”

Isak immediately thought of the cardigan but deflected for a minute while he tried to find a way to broach the subject, “Do you take vital signs at every visit?”

Pascale rolled herself over to the desk and jotted a few things down before then rolling back and gently sealing two fingers against the pulse of Isak’s wrist, looking up to the clock above the door, “It just helps establish your baseline. Alphas run slightly warmer than the rest of us but you tend to have lower resting heart rates and blood pressures. That said, everyone is a little different. Part of knowing how well your body tolerated the suppressants is to understand what your normal limits are at baseline. Some Alphas track to manage their ruts the way an ovulation cycles can be tracked in child-bearers: temperature goes up and there can be some slight body changes like bloating or aches. Nature designed us to be fail safe in that regardless of trying to monitor or regulate your rut, you’d survive the experience but it’s not bad to have a more innate understanding of what exactly your body is doing and when, or knowing what to expect depending on what stage of rut you are in”

Isak listened raptly; this was one of those moments when he realized that despite saying he didn’t want to deal with person-centered drama up close, he noted that he had some love for the way that biology in medicine could lend itself to being a serious career choice. Bedside manner was one thing, but Isak knew that his love of science would probably make being a doctor more worthwhile than not.

He also noted that Pascale said ‘child-bearer’ as opposed to just saying woman because it was an inclusive term that accounted for male omegas. It reminded Isak again of Even and he could understand why someone like him might like working here with the staff if they were all as balanced and straightforward as Pascale.

Now that he was back on the subject of Even, Isak carefully crafted his next question, “So, I live with roommates. We basically have a bunch of mutual friends and I ended up with someone’s sweater in my laundry, but it had this really awesome smell that I found kind of soothing? In a way? I’m not sure if it was perfume or the person’s actual scent and I know I can be more receptive to scents as an Alpha, but can odors really have significant physiological or psychological effects?”

Pascale released his wrist and rolled back over to her desk, smiling brightly at Isak after she jotted something more down and turned to face him, her hands clasped in her lap but her expression earnest, “These are my favorite types of questions! How about we start with what you remember from Sex-Ed?”

Isak paused, “You mean the stuff they teach you in high-school? I don’t remember that they went over scent bonds or anything in detail, maybe just that it was something that could happen. I remember that it was possible to be more or less attuned to possible mates or matches based on scents and that the scents themselves were also like the biological equivalent of bait”

Pascale was nodding along as Isak spoke and started speaking when he paused, hands up and fingers splayed: “If you ever get into healthcare, there is a whole course dedicated to Secondary Gender Dynamics slash Reproductive Capacity and Maturity but I had this awesome prof that basically explained that scent compatibility, in the context of contact or interaction, was just another biological facet of creating connections with others. It does, by definition, then have a significant impact on the concept of circumstance versus opportunity”

“Consider all the ways you meet people being a student: you work on projects and you participate in extracurricular activities; you go to parties and out clubbing; you travel to visit family in other cities or countries; and you get introduced to new people all the time through the osmosis of being the friend of a friend. Think of scent compatibility then as a subjectively quantifiable companion to intuition. People can be attracted to each other physically, outside of scent compatibility, but scent compatibility is a latent or low-key mitigating factor of sorts. It might bolster your attraction to someone you’ve already identified for yourself just as it might also alert you to a potentially compatible partner in a person you didn’t find classically attractive or didn’t meet in typical circumstances. It can be the tipping point between curiosity and confirmed interest. How you proceed with that extra information or data is on you”

“Knowing that, then, gives some idea has to how you can then be affected physiologically or psychologically by scent compatibility. It can give credence to that initial attraction or ‘spark’ that you may have felt towards someone and it validates those feelings of mutual attraction in a concrete way. Physiologically, there are chemicals that the brain releases when you are happy or elated or excited or relaxed and these in turn affect your psychological wellbeing by elevating or enhancing your positive moods, though the contrary is also possible. The brain has the capacity to associate scents with the release of those chemicals and there have been studies on the ability of scents to kick-start certain chemical responses”

Isak was nodding along when a thought occurred to him, “So if we’ve established that scent can have a powerful effect biologically speaking, how can we determine the brain’s capacity to distinguish a man-made scent, like a cologne or those neutralizing sprays you can get, from the natural scents that secondary genders can produce?”

The glint in Pascale’s eyes and her grin made Isak smile too, “I love a good debate! But we have basically reached the edge of my understanding of the topic. Secondary presentation is a strange evolutionary process that must have taken thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of years, to evolve and take its place amongst what is considered natural human physiology today. Where exactly the need even stemmed from is still being researched and hotly debated. Some are still trying to determine the necessity of creating physiologically gender abstract roles that could procreate in the first place when the basic formula of a man and a woman has usually sufficed. Some are still looking to understand the triggers that initiate secondary presentation in persons, regardless of prior transitions through puberty and seemingly headless of age or primary gender”

“At the end of the day though, and as far as we know, nature, or more specifically natural biology, does not tend to do things needlessly and so sometime, somewhere, at some point, a biological imperative fell into place and we evolved accordingly. Biology is the language we use to try to understand what we are experiencing but you’re right, we know we can react from scent but why certain scents instigate certain reactions is still pretty intangible. Lavender fabric softener always reminds me of my mom and gives me a warm feeling but that association is not only personal but also abstract. Furthermore, I can smell lavender from flowers or lavender from fabric softener and still have it elicit the same feelings simply by virtue of smelling like lavender to me”

Isak mulled this over briefly, “So you are saying there is no research that examines if we can distinguish between artificial or natural occurring scents but do acknowledge that the brain is affected regardless”

Pascale nodded, “I’m not personally that well informed but if you look into it, let me know the results of your queries! We are having an afternoon brainstorm but I’m sure this isn’t the first time anything like this was ever wondered about. Personally, I think scientists are romantics at heart: they love a good story and a happy ending in their own way. And, if you ask me, it doesn’t matter if its love at first sight or love at first scent, it is still a blessing to meet someone whom you are compatible with. Maybe you get together? Maybe you just make great friends. If a scent is comforting to you, that’s all it has to be if that’s all you want it to be. We are rational enough to make those distinctions, no matter what those Alpha-omega rom-coms might have you believe. But if the scent on the sweater is in fact just a cologne, isn’t it still interesting to get to know the person that picked that scent for themselves? What did it elicit for them that they chose it? Would you even be attracted to this person apart from the scent? Scent compatibility is still just quantifiable intuition, remember? It tips the scale but it can’t make the final decision for you”

Isak ended up being late to meet Jonas who eventually called looking for him when he was a half hour late.

Jonas was frowning at him until he was close enough for Jonas to see his expression, “Where were you? I thought it was just a quick follow-up”

Isak laughed, “I think I just met my spirit animal”

Jonas’ eyebrows climbed up his forehead, “Oh yeah? Do tell”

So Isak did.

~!@!~

After playing Fifa with Jonas and Magnus for a bit afterwards at their place, Isak decided to head home and do his laundry. He stripped the sheets off his bed and used it to bundle all the washcloths he’d used.

He washed Even’s cardigan after carefully reading the tag. It goes in with his darks and hangs to dry while Isak loads his stuff into the dryer.

He hadn’t thought a lot about how to return it but he knew an opportunity would present itself; he just needed to have it ready if that happened. Worst case, he would just keep it. Assuming Even thinks like a normal guy, and unless he really loved that particular cardigan, he’d probably get over not having it as part of his wardrobe. He probably wouldn’t even wonder about where it got to half as hard as Isak was wracking his brain on how to return it.

One thing was for sure: Isak decided that the next time he saw Even, he was going to ask about that cologne, come hell or high water.

Pascale was right: maybe they’d make good friends.

And if it just happened to double as an excuse to talk to the guy, Isak wouldn’t be mad about it, not even a little bit.

~!@!~

[Friday afternoon]

If someone had told Isak what was going to happen when he showed up with the boys to the club recruitment fair, he would not have believed them.

It was packed, for one, and Isak had to remind himself that there were a lot of students at their university. Just because he was only getting to know the ones in his program didn’t mean it was an accurate representation of the sheer variety of people that attended the university as a whole. The gym was packed with booths and attractions and they immediately split up, Magnus and Madhi headed off one way and Jonas dragging him off to hunt for some media-relations club he was hoping to get into.

Isak hadn’t really given much thought to what kind of clubs he might get into so he just soaked up all the different things he saw and waited to see if something would catch his eye. This was supposed to run until the end of Saturday as well, so he’d have some time to think on it.

Isak realized that someone had tried, at some point, to organize the booths by area of interest, according to a flyer that had been handed to him upon arrival but there were so many students milling about and simultaneous conversations happening that Isak found himself wondering what part of the world they had stopped in when Jonas finally did locate the booth he was supposedly looking for.

Isak let his eyes roam around as Jonas greeted a guy he knew and took in the spiel with regards to the club he was looking to join when Isak’s eyes zeroed in on the last thing he was expecting to see.

The hubbub split down the middle for a bit, and Isak could clearly see the booth across the way from where he was waiting for Jonas. It was a large booth with balloons of all different colors floating above it. Isak had seen them from a distance and wondered what it was for. This close, Isak could see that there were a number of things suspended in mid-air by the balloons but anchored with weights to the booth: an action board; a tripod for a camera; a weird hairy microphone; and other film related props.

But that wasn’t what caught Isak’s eye.

Sitting alone under the canopy of balloons and equipment was one Even Bech Naesheim.

Isak was moving before he realized it.

Even’s hair was down, long bangs nearly in his eyes and ears just poking out and had a look of total concentration on his face as he held his phone in both hands, leaning forward on the booth and balancing on his elbows. Isak could see he was wearing a dark tee, maybe black, maybe dark grey, and another cardigan, this one a burgundy red and rolled up to his elbows. He was wearing his Nixon watch, clock facing in at the left wrist, and looked up right as Isak stopped in front of him.

Even’s eyes widened comically and Isak, who had been thinking about Even near constantly since he saw him last, was finally gratified to feel like he was the one getting the jump on the situation. He’d never tried to charm a guy before but he knew what he looked like (a denim button-up open over a white tee; his black skinny jeans that made every inch of his 6’1 height pop; and he’d ditched wearing a snapback and done his hair), and he offered his best smile and a little wave, “Hey! Stuck on recruitment duty?”

Isak almost laughed when Even looked him up and down before sitting up a little straighter and laying his phone face down on the booth top, “Hiya! I’m actually just covering for my friends for 10 minutes”

Isak noted Even had an iPhone, and it again niggled at him that Even had no obvious social media, but he plowed on, a sudden idea coming to him, “So, funny story. When I left the clinic last week, I borrowed a grey cardigan on my way out because it was way cooler out then when I’d come in and I was wondering if anyone mentioned it was missing? I was hoping to return it in person and apologize”

Even looked adorably confused for a moment then laughed, loud and bright, “I think it’s mine? I usually leave a spare sweater when I’m back on shift the next day. I get cold all the damn time so it became a habit. As if; small world”

Isak was mentally so stoked he had to fight to keep his smile from curling deviously at the corners, “That is a pretty crazy coincidence! Are you manning this booth with your friends or?”

Even’s phone buzzed and he turned it over and glanced at it. Suddenly, his shoulders hunched and he looked caught for a second. Nervously, Isak thought, he flipped it back over and offered Isak another shy smile, though not as blinding as the first, “They are actually on their way right now so, I’ll be free to go back to the Clinic booth in a bit. Are you here with anyone?”

Just as Isak was going to answer, several things happened at once: Jonas showed up at his elbow, a sheaf of papers in hand and Even’s friends rolled up. Isak immediately recognized the ‘Hei Briskeby’ Squad, each of them pulling stools out from under the booth and flanking around Even like bodyguards.

The one Isak knew was Elias gave Isak a long, skeptical look and then glanced at Even who made a face at him and mouthed ‘What?”.

Jonas leaned in to Isak to whisper, “Whoa…intense”

The one Isak knew as Yousef gave Elias a light shove and nodded to Jonas, “Hey Vasquez, who’s your friend?”

Isak glanced at Jonas who squinted at Yousef for half a second before his face brightened into a smile and he reached over to offer his fist to bump, “Hey, man! I smoked a bole before I came out and I’m pretty sure I’m still mostly baked; this is Isak. And before you try to recruit him, he’s a Science major”

Jonas had always had a way about him that put people at ease and this was no exception. The whole crew seemed to laugh and Elias relaxed his stink eye on Isak.

Isak knew a cue when it was up, “What? I like concrete theories. It’s not a crime”

Adam and Mikael did the universal face and jazz hands for Neil deGrasse Tyson’s ‘We’ve got a badass over here’ and Even finally seemed to relax.

Isak could tell there was something protective about the squad when it came to Even and if Isak was curious about what Even’s deal was before now, he was only getting more sucked in.

There was a beat of silence before Jonas plowed on, “Got caught up talking to Julian Dahl, boys. How did he make it into our program?”

This must have been one of those inside jokes because it set the squad off. Even made eye contact for a split second with Isak before sliding his phone into his back pocket as he stood, “I’m gonna head back to the Clinic booth. Are we still going to yours after? I miss your mom’s cooking”

Elias must have known this was directed at him because he nodded but the one named Mikael answered, “Stay put and I’ll come grab you. Sonja will drive us”

Even smiled around at the squad and stepped away, “Don’t scare them all off ok? You got away with being the only ones in the club last year but don’t forget you promised the coordinator to at least get one new person”

Adam made a ‘shoo’ motion in Even’s direction, “We wouldn’t even have to recruit if your ass would just agree to take one for the team and join back up. Who needs more charm than this? We are rippling with skills up in here”

The one named Mutasim pipped up from where he was sitting in the back of the group, “Need one of us to walk you back?”

Even immediately shook his head and Isak thought it odd that they asked. Even was a grown ass man wasn’t he?

He didn’t get a chance to dwell on it because Sana was suddenly at his other elbow, “I know he’s the star of the group but you guys need to lay off him and work on yourselves”

Elias half scowled, half laughed and Yousef pretended to bite his fist, “Wow…just wow”

Isak remembered he was part of the conversation at that point; he’d been too focused on Even, “Sanasol! Got the girls sorted?”

Sana scowled at him and gave him a playful shove as the squad looked on.

Elias’ eyes popped out of his head, “This is **that** Isak?!?”

Isak’s eyebrows shot up into his hairline as he looked between Sana and Elias who seemed to be having a stare-down. After about thirty seconds, Sana slowly started to smile and roll her eyes and Elias grinned.

Sana sighed and gestured to the group at large, “Isak, this is my brother Elias and his derpy friends, Yousef excluded. Derp Central, this is Isak, my lab partner and the only guy I know with decent academic brains”

Jonas huffed, “Excuse you; I had better grades than Isak in maths and English”

Isak couldn’t help but laugh along with the rest. He didn’t think he’d have any fun like this when he agreed to come with the boys this afternoon and it was shaping up nicely as a not-waste of a Friday night.

Even again tried to inch away, “Ok. I’ll see you guys later. Nice meeting you…”

Even trailed off as he indicated Jonas and Isak jumped in, “This is my bro, Jonas. Jonas, this is Even”

They nodded to each other and Even gave Sana a one armed hug and slid away.

But not before making eyes at Isak for a half second over Sana’s head.

Isak’s heart leapt up into his throat and he forced himself not to watch Even walk away though he took note of what direction he disappeared in.

The next couple of minutes was an exercise in patience Isak had no idea he had. If he left too soon, it would be obvious he was going after Even and he didn’t want to set off his squad’s protective instincts but the longer he waited, the more he second guessed the look Even had given him.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he slid it out far enough to glance at it.

It was a text from Jonas that simply read: ‘Run interference?”

Isak was really grateful in that moment that his friendship with Jonas had survived so many things over the years, including his meddling in Jonas’ and Eva’s relationship back in high school, because no one quite knew Isak like Jonas did. He was there for Isak’s secondary presentation; he was there when Isak’s parents first split and his mother’s schizophrenia was at its height of uncontrolled; and he was there after Noora had first come back from London and upended things at home with Eskild and Linn. Isak had once been closed off and angry a lot, resentful of the things he’d had no control over, and Jonas had realized he was struggling and worked at him and kept himself available until, bit by bit, Isak had let himself rely on him. Not a lot, but enough.

Isak hadn’t told Jonas about Even, but Jonas had known something was up; he knew Isak that well.

Isak considered his options: if he had to come up with a plausible excuse by himself, it would likely take too long and if he didn’t try to go after Even now, he’d miss his chance to know if there was something more to them than just running into each other by chance indefinitely.

He sent Jonas the thumbs up emoji.

It took another few minutes but Jonas interrupted the conversation to declare that he suddenly remembered he needed Isak to grab something out of his locker and Isak took the opening for what it was and slipped away.

Isak didn’t make a beeline in the direction Even had gone in and instead stopped to consult the flyer with the layout printed on the back when he was safely out of sight. The Student Health Clinic booth was located near one of the Gym’s back exits and Isak quickly reoriented himself and made his way through the crowd.

It didn’t take him long to find it as the crowd seemed to be thinning and the booth itself was right next to an exit. It wasn’t as high traffic as the front and centre of the gym was.

Isak couldn’t help but feel like he’d fucked up and waited too long when he approached the booth and noted that it was only being manned by a petite brunet that was reading a book. Isak considered his options again: he could ask her if she knew where Even had gone or he could leave it alone and call it a night. He still needed to return Even’s cardigan but without at least having his phone number, returning it when Even was working at the clinic might a) take forever, b) make him look like a stalker, or c) cause him to lose his nerve again and remain in a limbo of low-key obsessed but pinning away.

The last option made him cringe enough that he stepped up to the booth, “Excuse me but I’m looking for my buddy, Even? He said he was going to be here tonight; do you know if he’s around here somewhere?”

The girl, whose name tag identified her as a volunteer by the name of Emma, starred up at him in shock for a moment before she snapped out of it, “He just went out for some air”

She indicated the nearby exit and Isak flashed her his best smile and strode away, dismissing the hopeful look on her face. He was only hoping to charm the pants off one person tonight and that was shaping up to be more work than Isak was used to having to put in. Not that he minded.

Outside was significantly cooler than inside the gymnasium. Isak had been thinking that Even was going to be hard to find but to his surprise, he spotted him almost right away. The leggy blond was sitting on the top half of a bench with his feet up on the seat, under a street light, just a few meters away by the parking lot.

Isak figured after all he’d been through trying to get the guy alone, he might as well go for it.

He tucked his hands in his pockets and strolled over, the gravel of the path crunching under his Vans sneakers, and announcing his presence as he got closer.

Even looked up reflexively and Isak walked around the unoccupied end of the bench to stand where Even could see him. Acting on a hunch, he tried for funny, “Sorry it took me so long; had to ditch your security”

Even laughed and pulled a sucker from his mouth, “You’re here now though, so you’re forgiven”

Isak was gratified to know he’d been right about the look Even had given him.

They both just smiled at each other for a second and Even dropped his gaze shyly and gestured to the empty bench space beside him, “I’m just taking a break. We can chill for a minute if you’re free”

Isak hopped up and sat. There was something really endearing about Even that charmed Isak. The guy didn’t act like a virgin exactly but there was something soft about him that made Isak want to be nice to him. It was an unusual sensation for Isak who, despite some curiosity, had never done this dance around a boy before.

Even reached up like he was going to tuck his hair behind his ear and produced a second sucker, which he offered Isak.

Isak laughed out loud, unbidden, but accepted the sucker. It was lime-green and he promptly unwrapped it and popped it in his mouth, “Is this an oral fixation thing?”

Even’s cheeks colored very slightly and he shrugged, “I know it seems weird but I used to smoke Jay, and it was bad for me and I smoked cigarettes for a while after that, and those are worse in a different way, so I had to quit all of it. But half of the smoking was about taking the break so…”

Isak could not have found the guy cuter if he tried. He schooled his features so he wouldn’t make eyes at Even and instead looked out over the parking lot. They were off to the right of the path out of the gym so they probably looked like two friends chilling and they were far enough off that it still afforded them some privacy though they could clearly see, and be seen, by people coming and going.

Isak kind of liked that it took some of the pressure off by forcing whatever this was to stay PG and casual.

“Have you thought about what clubs you might want to join?”

Isak decided an honest answer was best, “Have you seen it in there? I can’t even decide which way is up”

Even laughed at that, “It was more chill when I was in first year; it’s gotten way, way bigger since then”

Isak decided to tease, “You make it sound like you’ve been in uni forever”

Even shrugged, “I had to re-do a year in high school because life was happening too hard and then I lost half a semester in first year because of different drama, and so sometimes I feel like I have been here for ever, trying to wrap this up”

Isak did the math in his head for a second, “So you’re what? 21?”

Even nodded, “But I’ve been lucky to have lots of close friends and family, and they are a little protective, but only because I’ve had some rocky patches”

Even seemed sad and embarrassed all at once and Isak felt sorry for him so he decided to try lightening the mood, “If hot people never had a hard time, it’d be unfair to the rest of us. Besides, a little bullshit builds character, you know?”

Even’s answering smile was so endearing, Isak found himself smiling back, forgetting what he’d even said to make Even smile like that to begin with.

Then Even gave him another one of those low-key smouldering looks, “You think I’m hot?”

If Isak had learned anything about flirting, it was that it never paid to be embarrassed. He didn’t flirt this blatantly that often but when he did, he tried to say what he meant and mean what he said because it wasn’t in him as an Alpha to be a chicken shit, and if Isak was honest, he liked a challenge sometimes, “Did I stutter?”

And just like that, Isak watched the switch flip with Even again, as his cheeks colored a touch and he averted his eyes.

The guy would go from effortless chill to shy and timid and Isak could not even.

Isak cleared his throat and switched the sucker sides in his mouth, “You know what we haven’t talked about? When I can return your cardigan”

Even took the out for what it was, “I like that you know it’s a cardigan. The boys call all my shit sweaters no matter what they are”

Isak shrugged, “I have enough friends that are girls, you know. I’ve carried a few shopping bags”

Even gave him side-eye, “What are you implying?”

Isak gave him side-eye right back, “Nothing. Just that my woolly-warm-things game is on point. Why? What did it sound like I was implying?”

Even laughed, “You are actually killing me a bit”

Isak could not help the cheesy shit he said next, “Softly, I hope?”

Even groaned, “Oh, my God! I can’t with you”

They shared another one of those brief, sweet silences, both smiling and Isak remembered something suddenly, “Ok, but seriously, I have a question”

Even nodded, seeming slightly nervous, “Shoot”

Isak pulled the sucker from his mouth and turned to angle his body so he was facing Even dead on, “What cologne do you use? Because whatever it is, it was amazing and I need that shit in my life”

Even looked taken aback and then bemused. Frowning, he shook his head slowly as he answered, “I’m not sure what you mean? I don’t wear cologne”

Isak stopped cold.

It wasn’t cologne?

Even misunderstood his silence, “I mean, I’m pretty allergic to strong odors. I developed an allergy to pollen and few other things last year so, I mean, maybe it was my body wash or something?”

Isak knew body wash did not have that kind of staying power unless…Isak swallowed a lump in his throat.

Unless it wasn’t body wash or cologne to begin with.

Unless it was something he could be especially receptive to, as an Alpha.

Isak doesn’t get to finish that thought all the way because they are interrupted by the sound of someone approaching.

Even looks over his shoulder just as a blond girl rounds the bench next to Isak. He hears her voice before he sees her face, “I’ve been looking all over for you”

Even shrugs and she walks past Isak to stand in front of Even, close enough that his knees part to bracket her body. She’s blond with a pixie cut and big doe eyes and she’s slim and leggy with a large boys' military bomber jacket draped over her shoulders like a cape and Isak instantly dislikes her.

He watches in mute horror as she leans forward and blows an obnoxious raspberry of a kiss on Even’s cheek and he laughs, “Emma had to close the booth by herself, you know”

Even makes a face and the girl pats his knee, “No big deal. I helped her pack up”

Then, she turns to Isak and genially holds out a hand, “I’m Sonja. Nice to meet you…”

Even interjects, “Isak. Sonja, this is Isak”

Isak is on autopilot as he takes her hand and musters up a smile from where, he does not know, “Nice to meet you”

Sonja gives him a head to toe and smiles knowingly at Even, “Likewise”

There’s an awkward beat of silence and Sonja makes a wide-eyed face at Even who makes one right back and then she switches tactics and addresses Isak herself, “We are headed to a friend’s and I’m the DD so I’m sorry but I’m going to have to steal Ev”

Isak cringes at the nickname but outwardly radiates calm, “Yeah, that’s chill. I’ve got to get back to my squad too, actually”

Isak numbly hops down from the bench and walks away without a backwards glance.

He’s got too much on his mind to fake pleasantries and he needs out of there before he slaps Sonja’s hands off Even.

Isak doesn’t know what the actual fuck is his problem but he volunteers himself for a time out.

And if he ignores Even calling after him? Well, that’s his prerogative.

~!@!~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Addendum 1: When Even gets the text while manning the booth, it's Elias blowing him up like: 'Who the fuck is that?'
> 
> Addendum 2: I just wanted you guys to hang off a cliff with me; I hear it builds trust. But seriously, thank you for all the support and the wee sassy comments (I'll take some more if you have them, lol). I hope you enjoyed this extra long chapter as I am heading off to work for the next couple of days and won't update as quickly next time. Please be patient with me.


	3. Hook, Line & Sinker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Henrik Holm aka Even with his hair down! Pinterest knows what I like.
> 
> https://www.flickr.com/photos/168152327@N06/32232684698/in/dateposted-public/
> 
> ~!@!~
> 
> Music references:
> 
> Eskild’s German club tunes: SXTN – Von Party Zu Party, Fotzen im club, and Kein Geld/REMOE ft. NURA – NACKT
> 
> House party tunes: Duke Dumont X Gorgon City – Real Life/Disco Demoliotion 2018 (Stabekk Anthem) – J-Dawg & Lille Saus/Halsey – Bad at Love (Dillon Francis Remix)/Cardi B – Money/Keys N Krates – Music to My Ears/Amine – Spice Girl/Illenium – Crawl Outta Love ft. Annika Wells (KLOUD Remix)
> 
> Eskild’s pre-club game changer: SLVR – Old Picta

~!@!~

Chapter 3: Hook, line & Sinker

~!@!~

When Isak woke up late on Saturday morning to Eskild’ rendition, loud as hell and off-key, of Gloria Gaynor’s ‘I Will Survive’, he didn’t even get to pretend for a half a second that it was going to be a good day.

Isak didn’t like to admit to it, but he had a rotten temper. And he was fucking territorial something fierce when it was least appropriate.

Isak was well aware that it was both these traits of his that had broken Jonas and Eva up in high school. He was friends with both of them and yet, he’d suddenly gotten resentful of Jonas’ relationship with Eva and sabotaged it when he could have just as well left it alone. Sure, Eva put her foot in it by hooking up, however fleetingly, with Chris Schistad, but it wasn’t Isak’s job to judge other people’s mistakes.

Sometimes, it made perfect sense why Isak was Alpha and not something else based on the stereotypes alone: he was impulsive; he was territorial; he was moody as all get out when he didn’t get his way; and he didn’t handle his own drama well. He could never check himself before he overreacted and he came off as salty when really all he would be was frustrated or upset.

Last night had left a bad taste in his mouth and what Even thought of him at this point he didn’t want to think about.

He knew he’d made the right decision about walking away last night, in part because of how seriously Sonja had rubbed him the wrong way, but he also knew that ghosting after making that kind of headway was sending shitty mixed signals.

And Isak wasn’t an idiot, no matter how often he screwed up. If Even didn’t wear cologne than the only explanation what that they were in some way compatible. Isak could admit, even though it was bit shallow, that it made him feel more at ease that he was maybe biologically compatible with Even as opposed to just having a gay quarter-life crisis; that it was somehow more okay.

He’d also failed to sign up or volunteer for anything at the recruitment fair, even though that had been part of his reason for even going in the first place.

Isak moped for another half hour before Eskild’s yodeling got too much and he forced himself out of bed to see if he could end the apocalypse that was laying waste to his hearing.

Eskild was serenating Linn of all people and Isak effectively shut him up by simultaneously threatening bodily harm and promising to make breakfast all in one sentence.

Isak was making Linn’s toast while he kept an eye on Eskild’s eggs when he decided that he was going to have to get to the bottom of Even’s relationship with Sonja. He’d never have peace until he did.

After breakfast, Linn disappeared back into her room with a mumbled thanks and Eskild stayed with Isak at the kitchen table nursing a strong, dark coffee. Eskild often said that Isak wore his mood on his face and seemed poised to dig him up any second now. Eskild spoke fluid Isak almost better than Jonas.

Isak knew better than to dodge Eskild outright because that usually turned into an opera-with-a-side-of-car-chase-level drama and Isak had to admit that sometimes talking about his feelings, as had been suggested by the quirky school nurse back in high school, was a better way of digesting his angst.

Not that Isak ever liked to admit he was even angsty to begin with.

He and Eskild rarely ever talked about how they had met and Isak often looked back on that night, when he liked to think he’d been too drunk and too young to admit that his curiosity about boys was a real animal burrowed deep inside him, and wondered if Eskild had ever had to wonder about his own place in the world the way Isak often caught himself still debating.

Isak had once made the mistake of trying to compare and contrast Eskild and gotten schooled, rightly enough, on being overly entitled and condescending about something Eskild had the courage to face every day.

The thing was that no one had ever set Isak off quite like Even was. Sure, he’d tampered in Jonas’ relationship in part due to those kinds of feelings, but he’d outgrown them soon enough to move onto a general interest in other guys. But it had stayed borderline speculative until Even.

So, instead of coming to terms with it back in high school, Isak had put it on the backburner and was now having to deal with it like an adult with a lot less alcohol than Isak was used to and a lot more awareness than he was comfortable with.

Isak took a final sip of his coffee and contemplated Eskild in his silk bathrobe, noting the way Eskild cocked his eyebrow under the scrutiny as if to say ‘Well?’, and sighed, “I met someone”

Eskild nodded sagely, wiggling in his seat like he was settling on a cloud, “And, Baby gay? The punchline, please”

Isak decided to bite the bullet and blew it all out on one breath, “And I think I’m scent compatible with him”

Isak hid his face in his hands right after, waiting tensely for the explosion, but had to peak through his fingers when the bomb didn’t go off right away.

Eskild had a grin splitting his face and was nearly vibrating, “Tell me everything”

Eskild had learned to moderate his reactions when Isak was trying to get something out because his enthusiasm sometimes made Isak uncomfortable. Isak could admit he was a closet case but talking openly about dick wasn’t his flex, not like it was Eskild’s. Isak surprised himself by wishing that Eskild had overreacted instead of staying poised this one time though.

It was funny what you thought you wanted versus what you actually got, wasn’t it?

Isak contemplated where to start, “I met him at uni but I actually don’t know a lot about him. He’s got a girlfriend though, I think, but he never comes off as not wanting me to flirt with him, you know? Is that a thing?”

Eskild set his coffee aside: “As your Guru in all things twink”, here Eskild paused to wink in that over the top way that made Isak smile and cringe at the same time, “I can say that it’s not uncommon for straight guys to want to fool around. But what are you so worried about, if you are scent compatible? He can tell that for himself too you know”

Isak frowned, “What do you mean?”

Eskild rolled his eyes and made finger guns at Isak, “Scent compatibility goes both ways, Baby gay, so if your boy is acting interested, he’s interested. And when did women ever get in the way of true love?”

Eskild’s face was carefully blank for a moment before he flipped to mock-chagrined, “They do get in the way, don’t they?  Confusing all the lovelies that haven’t figured it out for themselves yet”

Isak used to think that Eskild thought everyone was gay, but he came to realize that there were probably more closet cases out there than there were out and proud ones, and Eskild was just trying to lead by example: being loud and happy and lit as Time Square.

Isak himself had come to appreciate it a little more than he used to over the years.

Isak plowed on, “I may have fucked it up though”

Eskild tuned back in, “Explain”

Isak squinted at Eskild, “I might have acted interested and then stormed off like an asshole when the girl showed up? Without saying goodbye or getting his number? Did I mention we’d been flirting hard the whole time we were talking?”

Eskild gave Isak an unimpressed look, “It’s because you’re still young that things like this seem to be such a drama: find this boy and apologize. Lay it on thick and ask him what the deal is with this girl. What if she’s his cousin? Won’t you look like a knot head”

Isak can admit to himself that he hadn’t thought about that…at all. They could be related, or long-time friends. Isak still spent a decent amount of time hanging out with Eva and they got looks when they were out and about together; he’s certain people have mistaken them for being a couple. And Isak was also aware that his relationship with Sana attracted a lot of attention in the same way because they were such an unlikely pair in addition to being so overtly different.

Isak decided Eskild was right: he’d hunt Even down and he’d ask about the things he was nosy about and he’d apologize. It was awkward to think he’d flirted shamelessly with Even without even knowing if he was unattached but Even hadn’t acted like he wasn’t single. Isak knew that he needed to ask to know for sure though. Besides that, he needed the guy’s phone number at least. They were in totally different programs and hardly shared an acquaintance or two between them, so it was going to take an active effort to develop something between the two of them.

Supposing Even was willing to give his jealous ass another chance?

Eskild had lapsed into silence while Isak contemplated life but must have grown tired of watching the steam come out of Isak’s ears, “And Baby Gay, remember to practice safe sex”

Isak spluttered into his coffee, “I don’t even have his number yet?!?!”

Eskild got up and set his mug in the sink, “Never too early to get ready for a special occasion”

Isak shrugged and quickly changed the subject lest he get a refresher course in the use of enemas, “Speaking of which, I’m going out with the boys later. Some house party. Are you working or do you want to come out?”

Eskild paused and spun away from the sink with a flourish, “Are you asking me out, Baby Gay?”

Isak ignored his knee jerk reaction to roll his eyes at the overuse of that nickname, “You work too much. I can’t remember the last time you said you were going out. Magnus loves when you come out”

Eskild preened and pursed his lips like he was actually contemplating refusing, “I do miss your darling boys. When are we leaving?”

~!@!~

After their chat, Eskild charges Isak with taking Linn out to do groceries.

Isak had lived with Eskild and Linn and at times Noora, for the better part of almost 3 years and it was inevitable that he might get attached and familiar. Eskild had explained to Isak once, very seriously, that Linn suffered from depression and needed to be stimulated every so often. Linn worked from home a lot of the time, but had anxiety about going out in public so Eskild made it their responsibility to have her accompany one or both of them out to run errands.

Linn wasn’t fond of getting out but she had become accustomed to making an effort.

Eskild wrote up a groceries list while Isak convinced Linn to get into the shower before him; he’d tried to get her ready after the fact and learned the hard way that Linn could be shockingly crafty and resourceful about making herself scarce inside of a three bedroom flat when she didn’t want to be made to go out.

Grudgingly, she headed off to shower while Eskild went through her closet and picked weather appropriate clothing.

Isak almost laughed at the drawn look on her face when he emerged from the bathroom after she was done but also knew that there was a difficult period for her between getting ready to go out and actually setting foot outside the flat that was clearly a bit terrifying.

Isak had had trouble in high school being a bit more sensitive to other people’s feelings but he’d learned to be a little more understanding with time. He often did what Eskild would do, offering Linn his elbow at the door and launching into a recap of his week to distract her as they descended the stairs to the lobby and onto the street.

The grocery store they frequented was in a smaller corner store that was about four blocks from their flat. It wasn’t especially cold out but Linn was tucked up against his side, her arm still looped in his.

Isak didn’t give her a hard time about it and kept chatting about inane things.

Linn sometimes was more nervous than average and had a tendency to focus on something intensely as a distraction tactic; Isak noticed she was frowning as she tried to match her stride to his so he slowed a little to make it easier on her.

If she noticed, she didn’t say, but she would look up every so often to show she was still listening and then resume frowning down at their feet on the sidewalk as she continued to match their steps.

There were plenty of people out on a Saturday and Eskild insisted on taking Linn out when it was busy to try to reduce her anxiety in crowds. Eskild was a big fan of shock therapy as he playfully called it but so far it had worked more often than it had backfired and Linn steadily got less tense the longer they walked. She quietly murmured a reply or two when Isak asked a neutral question and she kept her gaze on the street ahead of herself instead of focusing quite so much on their feet as they made their way across the crosswalk to the store.

Inside, they also had a routine. Isak put Linn in charge of the shopping cart, which gave her something to do with her hands and used the grocery list to pilot her around the store.

He left her briefly to pick some fruits and veggies while he double back to grab stuff to stock his Emergency Rut kit. Linn was good as long as she was focused and Isak didn’t dawdle before heading back over to her.

On his way over, he noticed two girls that were across the fruit stand from Linn and were clearly gossiping about her. Isak always found it a bit terrible that girls could be so mean to each other. He remembered even Sana getting sucked into some drama back in high school because of how fake girls could be with each other.

He didn’t like how Linn seemed to be trying to will herself invisible, so he picked up his pace and sidled up right next to her a minute later, “What do you want to eat for lunch?”

Linn looked so relieved that it was awkward so Isak pretended not to notice. She blinked at him but didn’t answer right away and Isak deposited his snacks in their cart, “You just want to sleep through lunch, don’t you?”

Linn squinted at him and he laughed, “You know eating is a necessity, right? Want pizza maybe?”

Linn was about to answer when her eyes shifted to something over his shoulder.

Isak turned to follow her gaze and it was to the two gossip girls who suddenly stopped whispering when his eyes fell on them.

Isak squinted at them, “Can I help you?”

Both girls seemed to get the point and promptly shot Isak annoyed looks but buggered off.

Isak turned back to Linn who had a very slight smile on her face.

Isak laughed, “Liked that, did you?”

Linn shrugged but her smile got wider.

Linn didn’t ever answer him about lunch so Isak bought frozen pizza, but she also seemed in a decent mood on the walk home.

Eskild nagged them about the things they forgot but he also almost stroked when Linn offered to go back for them if Isak was willing. 

Isak did smug very well and he knew it was a good look on him.

~!@!~

Isak spent the early afternoon doing homework and got a decent chunk done on a paper for a notoriously picky professor. Come supper time, Eskild was bugging him to invite the boys to pre-drink at theirs.

Isak first sent Sana a quick text asking her to sign him up to something at the recruitment fair before she went home for the day, knowing before-hand that she had planned to go into the library today to help Eva and Vilde with some project, to which he got a lightly salted reply about not being prickly at her choice. Isak was just glad she was doing him a solid.

Isak then fired off the reminder invite in the group chat and had a second lightning-fast shower before contemplating his clothing options. Isak didn’t expect to know anyone other than Eskild and the boys at this party so he wasn’t especially worried about making an impression. Isak couldn’t discount the fact that he’d been running into Even in the most unexpected situations lately and while he seriously doubted he would see him out tonight, he didn’t really feel like breaking protocol, just in case.

He chooses to compromise: dark denim jeans, a white tee and a zip up hoodie. He couldn’t be assed to style his curls, instead opting for his nicest snapback, a brown leather one Jonas had splurged and gotten him on his 18th birthday that they agreed to share, and rolled a joint that he tucked into the stiff rim of the snapback for later.

He wasn’t doing anything tomorrow and he could use the break.

He moved to the living room and tidied idly while Eskild kicked off the night by blasting the club tunes on his portable speaker. Eskild was serious if he was already dialed up to the German dance tunes: shit that was pop-y with lots of bass and terribly catchy for being in a whole other language. Isak bopped his head along, knowing there was no one watching.

Jonas and Madhi were the first to roll in just after 7 and they were followed fairly closely by Magnus, who’d managed to rope Chris and Vilde into coming out, on his loop to grab them beer. They played Cards Against Humanity and took shots every time Magnus lost his mind when his white cards didn’t win. They were well on their way to drunk by the time Jonas’ phone started blowing up because his Media Studies’ buddy, the one hosting the party, was wondering if he was still coming out.

Isak really appreciated that their flat was a short walk to grab the bus and that the house party was in student housing just outside the university proper. Isak also liked being late; it never paid to be on time to these things. Jonas introduced them to his buddy and Isak and Jonas were immediately roped into a game of beer pong. They won three rounds in a row before they were dethroned and Isak swapped out with Magnus to hold court with Madhi on a sofa in the living room. They people watched for a while, making up stories about them, until Isak recognized some familiar faces.

Elias was first, followed by Yousef and Mikael. Isak’s heart was in his throat, thinking Even might be the next one through the door but groaned out loud when Sonja slipped in and shut the door behind herself, signaling the end of the procession of Balloon Squad members rolling through.

At Mahdi’s questioning look, Isak just shook his head and mimed going to grab them more beers, to which Madhi nodded. Isak knew he was going to need more booze then he currently had in his system if he was going to deal with seeing Sonja.

Isak had to manoeuver around quite a few bodies in the narrow hall leading to the kitchen and wasn’t surprised that there was a game of table top ping pong going on with red cups lined down the middle as a demarcation line. Isak snagged two beers out of the fridge and was turning to brave the hallway when he ran right into someone that had been standing too close behind him.

Blinking down, Isak vaguely recognized the little brunet that was smiling shyly up at him. He was lucky she seemed to know that they didn’t really know each other because she leaned up on her tip toes and Isak obligingly tipped his head to hear her, “I’m Emma. I was doing the Student Health booth with Even”

Isak’s eyebrows cocked in recognition, “Hey. I remember. Here with friends?”

Isak could already feel the condensation forming on the neck of beer bottles he had double fisted in his left hand.

Emma nodded, “My friend Ingrid is in the same class as Martin”

Isak was looking for something to say back, caught in that conversation limbo you could get into talking to someone you had nothing in common with, when someone shoved him from behind. He was able to brace his arm and not crush Emma between himself and the counter, as the offender called an apology over his shoulder and fled the scene.

Isak’s face was making his best Clint Eastwood impression after the guy when Emma’s hand touched his arm.

Isak snapped his gaze back to her and hastily stepped away when he realized how close he was standing, “Sorry”

Emma blushed and he caught a neutral puff of scent off her that firmly labelled her as Beta. Isak internally groaned. She didn’t have a crush on him, did she? It’s not that she didn’t seem nice, but Isak could admit he was pretty preoccupied with Even at the minute and the idea of fooling around with anyone, even though he’d had barely anything other than a little face time with the guy, made him feel a little jungle creepy. She was exactly the type he’d have fooled around with without a second though in the not-so-distant past but had exactly zero desire to deal with right now.

Isak was sure that Magnus would have set fire to the place if he knew what Isak was about to do.

Thinking fast, he decided to do the most cock-block thing at his disposal, “Let’s get out of here. I can’t hear myself think”

He gestured for her to follow him and wove back down the hall and into the living room where Mahdi had managed to keep their spots by lying down across the sofa. He obligingly shifted to a sitting position when he spotted Isak. Isak quickly sat to his left and snugged himself up against the armrest and gestured for Madhi to make room for Emma, who stood awkwardly for a moment before sitting to Mahdi’s right.

Isak handed a beer to Madhi, “Bro, this is Emma. Met her at the recruitment fair”

Emma smiled at Madhi, “Nice to meet you”

True to his friendly nature, Madhi was an excellent conversational buffer between Isak and Emma and Isak relaxed a bit.  

He was able to resume people watching while Madhi occupied Emma and without meaning to, he ended up keeping a look out for the Balloon squad. He eventually spotted them in the far corner of the living room, holding court on a coffee table that had been repurposed as seating and Isak almost did a double take when he saw Sonja sitting on Mikael’s lap with her arm slung around his neck.

Eskild had commandeered the sound system and was in the process of shifting the low key vibe to pre-club prep with a dark, bass-y thumper. Elias and Yousef were having a kind of dance off with Eskild, trying to outmanoeuver each other in the corner that was blocked off by the coffee table. 

Isak watched as Sonja and Mikael cheered them on, along with the rest of the people in that corner of the living room, and got more confused the longer he watched Sonja. She was full on acting like Mikael’s girlfriend: she shared her red cup with him; idly ran her hand through his hair every so often; and never moved from his lap. Mikael reciprocated, subtly but steady for his part, a hand always on her hip or his chin hooked over her shoulder.

Isak knew that if it quacked like a duck and it walked like a duck and it looked like a duck, then it was probably a fucking duck but he also knew he wasn’t mistaken about the familiar way she had around Even. That it was more personal than standard girl-guy friends. But there was clearly something else going on. Exes maybe? The though appeased Isak but also still managed to annoy him because it entertained a scenario where Sonja had put her hands on or around Even’s person at some point in time.

Isak actually refused to think what else of hers had probably touched Even.

Abruptly, he’s pulled from his musings when Magnus popped out of nowhere and commandeered Madhi who shrugged at Isak and said his goodbyes to Emma, leaving Isak and Emma alone again.

Isak doesn’t want to be a weirdo so he turned his body on the sofa, angling himself towards Emma and she followed his lead, doing the same.

She glanced at him shyly and gestured towards the end of the living room that had been occupying Isak’s attention, “They are pretty good dancers”

Isak nodded, “My friend Eskild is a hard-core club rat”

Emma inclined her head, “Which one is he?”

Isak glanced over his shoulder to see Eskild doing a fairly decent job at twerking, minus the necessary ass required normally, “The one imitating a stripper on a pole”

Emma laughed, delighted, “Oh! The gay guy. He’s really a lot of fun, isn’t he! How do you know him?”

Isak didn’t know if it was years of living with Eskild that did it, or the fact that he was personally in the middle of a debate about labels himself, but Emma’s casual generalization of Eskild being the token gay rubbed him the wrong way, “Eskild saved my life, actually. So he’s just an awesome person who also just happens to be gay”

Emma had detected the slight abrasive edge in his voice because she frowned, “I hope I wasn’t being offensive. Gays are usually really cool people”

Isak barely resisted rolling his eyes, again feeling defensive for some reason, “That’s just it though: Eskild being gay isn’t all he is. He’s funny and tough and resourceful and the most confident person I know. So I know that lumping him in as ‘gay’ isn’t doing him justice, you know?”

Emma nodded, trying to lighten the mood, “I get what you mean, but don’t take this the wrong way: he’s pretty blatant, you know? No one is going to look at him at not think he’s anything other than probably gay. He’s not hiding it or anything”

Isak nodded, “And I get that, but Eskild is out and loud and proud because he’d trying to lead by example. Being gay is part of who he is but it’s not what he is”

Emma smirked, “Now I get why you and Even are friends.  But seriously, let me off the hook, okay? I wasn’t trying to be offensive; anybody that didn’t know him would probably come to same conclusion as me”

Isak’s gut twisted a bit. Then what about someone like him? What about someone that didn’t fit the so-called-textbook-mold that Eskild doubtlessly got lumped into everyday by people that didn’t even know him? Where did that leave him?

Isak’s mouth was on autopilot, “What about secondary-gender same-sex couples then? Biology says they are compatible based on years of evolutionary intuition, but you’d still label them?”

Emma gave Isak a long look, “Honestly, it’s not about labelling per se. We happen to live in a world where only a certain percentage of the population have secondary genders and only two compatible people can even detect each other’s scents for the most part. So for someone who isn’t scent sensitive or a beta like me, all you can really go on is what it looks like, right? And it’s going to look like two girls together or two guys together and the universal labels for that is lesbian or gay, so I’m not reinventing the wheel when I say stuff like calling your friend gay and I’m not trying to be offensive either. It is what it is, right?”

Isak digested this with a heavy heart. It was all true really. The part of him that was mollified by the fact that he and Even were scent compatible was suddenly insignificant in the sense that he’d partially clutched at it as being validation that it was okay to like Even. And it **_was_** okay for him to like Even, regardless of scent compatibility, but it wasn’t going to change how people were going to label them if they ever got together. And Isak was going to have to come to terms with that if being with Even was something he wanted.

Isak sat back and blew out a breath: mind blown.

He and Emma lapsed into silence and Isak startled when Emma sidled up closer and put her hand on his leg, “You’re really nice, you know? Getting so worked up on your friend’s behalf”

Isak was caught between exasperation and hysterics for a second, trying to decide if he wanted to roll his eyes or laugh out loud. He also did neither and Emma was suddenly leaning closer.

Isak’s mind blanked because there was only so much dodging he was capable of with girls being such crafty creatures and being fresh out of ideas.

“Em! He’s taken, you dirty kid!”

Isak is saved by Sonja, of all people, who used her hands to shoo them apart and ploped down between them, playful smile on her face and red cup still firmly in hand.

Emma colored, “What?”

Isak also gave Sonja a disbelieving wtf-look that she ignored, winking at him.

She shrugged and looked between the two of them, “Consider yourselves notified. I have a good friend who has dibs on Isak, Em. Just because he doesn’t know it doesn’t make it okay for you pounce on him, you know?”

Emma looked confused for a hot minute then laughed, having come to the conclusion that Sonja must be joking, while Isak’s heart tripped over itself at what he thought Sonja is implying.

Sonja worked fast and casual, throwing an arm over Isak’s shoulder, and handing Emma her full red cup, “You own me a smoke. Let’s go”

She tipped her chin towards the apartment balcony doors and Isak took the out for what it was, “Right! Sorry Em”

They both stood and Isak followed Sonja to the doors and out into the cool evening. There was a couple making out in the corner, a big blanket likely appropriated from inside wrapped around them, but they remained oblivious to Isak and Sonja.

Isak fished the joint out of the rim of his snapback and held it out to Sonja who smiled at him as she fished a lighter out of her impossibly skinny jeans and set the joint between her lips, cupping a hand around it as she lit it, taking a long, deep drag like a pro, then three puffs in quick succession before passing it back.

Isak only snapped out of it when she wiggled the blunt at him when he didn’t immediately take it back.

Isak had been functioning on autopilot but he didn’t think she was actually going to light it or puff on it like a regular. She cocked an eyebrow at him, as if reading his mind, and blew the smoke out the side of her mouth, “We good?”

Isak nodded, realizing that he’d maybe misread Sonja, “My wingman game has got nothing on yours”

Sonja smiled and Isak could see now how genuine it was when he wasn’t too busy being jealous, “I’m glad we understand each other”

Isak looked out over the balcony at the view of the university at night, people still milling about campus and buses still running, and took a few puffs himself, “Was he mad?”

Sonja shrugged and leaned against the balcony rail, accepting the blunt Isak passed back, “I convinced him it was me. I saw the way you were looking at him before I showed up. You’re an Alpha?”

Isak startled, “That obvious?”

Sonja laughed, and it was full and throaty in a grown woman kind of way, “Yes and no, but it explains a lot”

They lapsed into a short silence; Isak imagined they were both just letting the high sink in.

Sonja shivered and Isak pulled his hoodie off and offered it to her. Sonja shrugged and accepted. She then turned so she was facing him and pursed her lips, “I need to get at you for a minute”

Isak nodded, leaning to stub out the blunt against the concrete side of the building and giving her his full attention, “Shoot”

Sonja smiled again, “No hesitation; I like it. But seriously, how interested are you? And I’m not running game: I really need to know”

Isak could see she was being real and open so he extended her the same curtsy, “We’re scent compatible; I’m not looking to hook up with anyone else and I can’t stop thinking about him”

Sonja’s eyebrows shot up, “He didn’t tell me that”

Isak shrugged and went somewhat sheepishly for broke, “He might not have figured it out. I met him at the Student Health Clinic before my rut and I might have borrowed his cardigan for comfort purposes”

Sonja’s laugh startled the couple in the corner and they moved inside. Sonja watched them go, still chuckling, “Honest; more points. But seriously, I want to help you out but you have got to know what you are getting into. He’s had some things happen, big life changing things, and the boys are on high alert when it comes to Ev. But he’s lonely, I can see that, and he hasn’t talked to me about anyone in so long and you actually seem like a nice guy so…”

Isak knew he was getting even less than the abridged version but he also knew it wasn’t possible to lay other people’s secrets bare without their permission. Isak understood Even had some baggage and some bodyguards, but it made him feel strangely good that Even had people like Sonja that he could rely on. Isak wanted in on that, he knew he did, but he also recognized that he was going to have to put in the work.

Sonja jumped when her phone vibrated in her pocket and she gave Isak an apologetic look, answering the call, “What’s up?...I was getting some air…Oh?...Yes, I’m coming. I’ll meet you downstairs. Is he here yet?...okay. Yes, I’ll only be a minute; I just need to use the bathroom before I come down…yes, babe. Bye”

Sonja rolled her eyes, “Mikael; the boys are leaving. I guess some people are going out?”

Isak and Sonja both looked into the living room from outside and could see the flurry of activity inside.

Sonja looked back to Isak and let out a breath, “Give me your phone”

Isak’s gut clenched hard but he unlocked it and handed it over without a second thought. He watched her tap at the screen and pause for a second before she made to hand it back, “I’m trusting you, ok? Because I have a good feeling about you, but the boys will rip you to shreds if you fuck up, got it? So it’s not just me you have to worry about convincing. Be your best or it won’t be enough”

Then she returned his phone, moved close enough to peck him on the cheek and returned his hoodie before disappearing inside.

Isak didn’t dare check for a few seconds but he eventually looked down.

The white of the screen seemed extra bright in the dim of the night but clear as day was a new entry: Even BN with a number.

~!@!~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gonna really start to blow up you guys up in the coming chapters. Hope you enjoyed!


	4. Tongue-in Cheek (Prelude)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Snippet in Even's POV
> 
> Inspo tunes: Kid Francescoli - Moon
> 
> Anybody watching SKAM Italia?

~!@!~

Chapter 4 Snippet: Tongue-in Cheek (Prelude)

~!@!~

Even was dead sleep when his phone rang sometime after two am on Sunday. He fumbled for it too late and Epson was already barking his rear end off.

Even pleaded with him: “Stop!”

The miniature Schnauzer paused and blinked, eyebrows raised as if in surprise and Even couldn’t even stay mad, reaching over to scratch behind his ear, sighing and letting his head fall back onto his pillow.

Even blinked a few times and tried to look at his screen but winced as the brightness in the pitch black of his room nearly seared his eyeballs. He quickly swiped the brightness down and tried to focus in on the notification for the missed call.

Sonja.

He frowned and confirmed that it was 2:23 in the morning. He was about to tap the missed call bubble to call back when the doorbell rang and Epson shot off the bed and nosed the door open, making a mad dash down the stairs, barking all the way.

Even moaned and rolled onto his knees and crawled to the end of his bed.

Even hated to be cold and debated putting his house coat on over his onesie but decided he’d be back in bed soon enough if it was who he thought it was. The hall night-light was enough to navigate the stairs by and Even regretted not putting on his slippers when he set his bare foot on the first of 16 freezing artisanal wooden steps down to the main floor.

The doorbell rang again and he resigned himself, lopping down as fast as his long legs would carry him until he hit the main floor and shuffled like a zombie into the foyer, not bothering to check who it was through the peep hole before he yanked the door open.

Epson had worked himself into a lather, and was practically vibrating with his low stranger-danger growls that ceased as soon as he saw who was on the other side, swapping out into an excited high pitched whine that had Even smiling and cringing at the same time.

Sonja and Mikael had a drunk Elias passed out and propped up between them and Even wordlessly swung the door wider for them to frog-march in. They dropped Elias off in the living room, on the low, wide Chaise and Even fished a hairy afghan blanket out of the blanket chest to spread over him.

Mikael kissed Sonja goodnight and ruffled Even’s hair before they walked him back to the door and locked it behind him when he left. Sonja looped her arm through his and they went back up the stairs and into Even’s room, Epson at their heels.

Even immediately burrowed back into bed and narrowly missed getting blinded a second time when Sonja flipped the lights on without any warning, shoving his head under his body pillow.

He listened as Sonja dug around for the spare pair of pajamas that she left here for these occasions, “You’re such an old man now. When did you get into bed?”

Even ignored her and stayed where he was, well on his way back to sleep until she cannonballed into bed next to him and startled a laugh out of him. Epson was at the bottom of the bed, turning in circles over his feet as if it would make his body lumps under the duvet go down flat, and finally lay down in the narrow space between his ankles.

Sonja had turned off the lights but left the bedroom door open, so he could see her cheeky grin as she yanked the pillow off him, “Guess who I saw”

Even perked up immediately, “Actually?”

Sonja looked smug, “We even had a chat”

Even was wide eyed as he starred at her, “You promised you’d leave him alone!”

Sonja frowned at him, “Fine. I won’t tell you what we talked about then”

She turned her nose up at him and fell back against the bed spread.

Even sat up and hit her with the end of his body pillow, “At least tell me it was a coincidence so he’s not somewhere thinking you are part of my security detail”

Sonja frowned up at him, “It **_was_** a coincidence. A happy one! And I’m fucking smooth okay? Isak even said so: his wingman game **_pales_** in comparison to mine! He admitted it!”

Even was confused for a minute, “Wingman?”

Sonja sat up, nodding, “Guess who is for sure going to text your pretty, affection-starved ass soon?”

Even’s jaw dropped, “You gave him my number? Without Mikael or Elias seeing?”

Sonja rolled her eyes but yawned halfway through it so the effect was muted, “Yes and who do you think I am? I rescued him from **_Emma_**!”

Now Even was really confused, “Emma?”

Sonja stifled another yawn, fluffing the body pillow and laying it so she could use one end and leave Even the other, “Stealthy kid was making a move on your man! I couldn’t let that happen! I am queen!”

Even frowned at her but she was already falling asleep, her breathing slowing and evening out as he watched.

Now Even was wide awake, with a buzzing keenness in his gut, and wanting the full story on how Sonja had just managed what Even couldn’t after meeting Isak the same number of times as him.

Girls were scary, he concluded, but he was thankful for this particular one.

They’d dated early on in high school, drawn to each other by something they had mistaken as chemistry, but Even was thankful their friendship had survived what came after. She understood him best, being the same as him; being Omega.

Even had to admit he’d been anxious about telling Sonja about Isak. His life had taken such a dramatic series of turns in the last two years and he’d been re-invented by circumstances not once, but twice, and far enough apart that it was like a do-over both times. Sometimes he wondered who he even was anymore, and that fear of triggering something else had kept him closed off; kept him from dating.

Kept him from being the person he was before.

Even often thought back to the time before he had presented. It had been traumatizing in a way to go from having a near Alpha personality and outlook, to the softer, infinitely more sensitive Omega he’d become. The conflicting hormones alone had almost killed him.

Even recalls his Gender-specialist physician explaining that male omegas were increasingly rare in part due to high mortality rates: the conflict of hormones in a male presenting with a secondary gender that was the direct opposite to the primary gender often experienced not only painful physical changes but dangerous spikes in suicidal ideation, severely unstable mood, and body dysphoria. And why wouldn’t that happen? It was basically like experiencing an extended crash course in PMS for the first time, while mentally being a man, and getting a kind of biological gender-reassignment surgery all in one. Never mind the psycho-social impact; that was a fresh hell of its own.

And there hadn’t been a choice in the matter. Once triggered, there had been no stopping it.

Even recalls his doctor saying secondary gender presentation sometimes had no overt triggering factors and was often spontaneous but Even figured he knew what had done it. He’d kept that to himself even after all this time, in part because he’d suffered such an intense loss of privacy, shit hitting the fan hard during the year he was supposed to have graduated high school with his friends.

He understood better now that it had had everything to do with being ashamed; with having feelings he knew conceptually he shouldn’t have while his heart and body had ignored common sense.

And that was only the first half of it. When Even had later developed actual mental health concerns, which had apparently been par for the course considering his secondary presentation and hereditary predisposition, he’d lost his mind all over again. Literally.

To say Even had seen some shit was putting it mildly but he’d eventually stabilized: his parents and close circle of friends had rallied around him; his gender physician and psychiatrist started working closely together; his fucking traitor of a body finally, finally settled into what was going to be his new normal; and wiping every trace of old Even off the Internet and seriously limiting other people’s access to himself after the fucking scandal that had been his last semi-normal time as just pre-Omega Even finally brought him a sense of normalcy.

But for a while even after the dust had settled, he’d just stopped.

Stopped being who he thought he was because he’d needed to mourn. And it was crazy to think you could have to mourn yourself, but that’s exactly what had happened. That Even was dead and gone.

He mourned the whole summer before his second year at University, when he’d had to lay bare all his baggage for the dean of his program to have special arrangements made to continue his education.

So he could make a go, again, at trying to be normal.

He knew he’d been dramatic about it, but he’d been prepared to give up.

Prepared to be afraid of strange guys he didn’t know because of what was now a permanent vulnerability of his person.

Been prepared to forever second guess his interactions and feelings for people he’d only just met; guarding his past like the giant chip on his shoulder that it was; that it would always be.

But Isak had immediately stood out.

Isak who was forward and honest and easy to read with his quick temper and obvious interest and his laid-back jokes.

Isak who wore his confident Alpha personality on his sleeve, not put off by Even’s height or shyness.

Isak who was younger and unguarded and open to Even in a way he probably didn’t even know he was being.

Isak who seemed to tick all of ‘new’ Even’s boxes.

Even knew he should only be cautiously optimistic at best, but something was so right about Isak that, even though he was terrified, he knew he’d have to try.

Knew that if he was going to suffer anyway, that at least it would have been his choice for once. That he could still make choices and have some control. 

And so he’d mentioned it to Sonja; Sonja who knew him best. And one thing had led to another and now Even was here, anticipation building and buzzing inside him.

Even realized when he finally lay back down but didn’t close his eyes again until the sun started peaking in around his yellow blinds on Sunday morning, that it wasn’t just anticipation: that it was hope.

~!@!~ 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am having so much fun with this. Loved writing this snippet and will probably do more going forward because they make my heart sing, lol.
> 
> I will try to get the next chapter out before the end of the week but no promises as the future-hubby comes home from over-seas on Friday and I have not finished the Christmas deco or wrapped any of the pressies and am working through another set of nights. Life is doing me a hecking hard time. 
> 
> Tell me what you guys think! I love reading your comments. Cheers also for the kudos! 
> 
> Most of all, I just hope you enjoyed!


	5. Miss the Sunlight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thanks for being patient and for the kudos that reminded me you are still reading! This is part 1 of 2 because I didn't want to go too much longer without posting but also because Part 2 is a doozy. 
> 
> Inspo tunes: Heavy, California by Jungle

~!@!~

Chapter 5: Miss the Sunlight

Part 1

~!@!~

Isak woke late on Sunday with full on sun in his face, his head throbbing dully, and his back pressed against someone else’s in a bed he couldn’t remember lying down in. He did a quick mental tally and confirmed that he was still fully dressed, hoodie and all. His eyes felt glued shut and heavy, and he didn’t immediately recognize where he was when he opened them.

Trying to focus while the taste in his mouth came to attention was hard, but Isak willed his gag reflex to chill and took several deep breaths. It was funny to think, but Isak still sometimes managed to forget what it was like to fall asleep drunk and high and what getting up the next day was like, as if he hadn’t done it often enough since high school. What was changing was that the older he got, the less he was able to brush it off as the bi-products of a good night out. God, he was getting old at heart. He could do without the breath and the headache threatening to be a full blown bomb threat.

The person behind him moved and Isak glanced over his shoulder and recognized Jonas’ mop of hair.

Isak then realized that he must be in Jonas and Magnus’ apartment. They were really unlikely roommates, but Jonas was grounded and organized so it was good for Magnus who contributed by being the stress relief when Jonas got too intense or when he got over hype about his social injustice soap box, which was more often now that he was turning into a little activist in Uni.

Isak slid his hands down over himself, trying to locate his cell and found it in his back pocket. He jarred Jonas a little, who mumbled but didn’t wake and brought his phone out to where he could see it. When he pressed on the home button, his phone opened into his contact info for Even.

Isak couldn’t believe that Sonja had given it to him, easy as that, and now that he had it, he was dying to do something with it.

Isak did know that he needed to make a good impression; that he wanted Even to want to answer him and not blow him off, as if there was any actual risk of that. There was a lot more pressure trying to get to know someone from scratch when you already felt personally invested though.

Isak locked his phone and tucked it under his pillow when Jonas startled him, speaking blearily from where his face was pressed into his pillow, “Make coffee if you’re up”

Isak groaned and stretched, “What happened to being a gracious host?”

Jonas tossed his elbow back and it bit into Isak’s right side, “You snored all fucking night”

Isak rubbed the sore spot, “Since when is that news to you?”

Jonas moaned, “Get out”

Isak laughed. Jonas was rarely whiney and it was only because he wasn’t much of a morning person and never had been.

“If I get up, you have to come out and get it. I’m not your bitch”, Isak teased, sitting up.

Jonas mumbled something vague that Isak decided would have to do as far as assent went.

He levered himself all the way upright and shuffled to the door and out into the hallway.

Magnus’ room door was closed but Isak could hear him on the phone speaking to someone so knowing that they were both awake made it okay not to be too quiet while he shuffled around their kitchen.

Isak had the coffee brewing before he decided to have a good go around for something to go with it. He located some frozen Green onion pancakes in the freezer. Jonas had dated a lot since Eva, all really low-key stunners that had Isak wondering why Magnus thought him the chick magnet when Jonas was pulling these wonder women out of thin air. The thing about Jonas too, was that he was sensitive and confident at the same time so he didn’t ever play into these girls’ unrealistic expectations and he always let them down easy when the situation called for it. He did however, have a habit of getting programmed by these girls. Isak remember the Asian foreign exchange chick that had instigated Jonas’ love for Green onion pancakes which he’d later extended to the boys. They probably didn’t eat them the way it was intended, Magnus in particular a big fan of topping his with an inch of cream cheese, but they went well with a lot of things and ate well as a standalone snack.

Isak dug out Jonas’ ancient George Forman grill, also not often not used as intended, and plugged it in. They had discovered early on that this was also the easiest way for getting crispy green onion pancakes that never burned without the hassle of pan frying them.

Jonas finally emerged, scratching his belly and yawning like the lion at the start of the movies.

Jonas poured himself a cup of coffee and settled at the table.

Isak only had to take one look at him to know he still wasn’t ready for life yet.

Magnus was next, tiptoeing into the kitchen and around Jonas to also grab a cup of coffee, making a show of winking at Isak as they booth tried not to laugh and startle Jonas who was an absolute bitch until he'd had a few mouthfuls of coffee.

Isak got glared at something fierce though when he involuntarily barked a laugh because Magnus had sidled up behind Jonas and started doing a weird wiggle dance complete with finger guns in Isak’s directions, with his coffee cup in hand, and just barely missed splashing Jonas’ shoulder with a bit of coffee.

Isak plated the green onion pancakes and passed them over to Magnus one at a time and they settled on either side of Jonas, smirking at each other.

In the silence that followed, Jonas drank all the coffee in his first cup, then got a second one, before finally becoming sociable, “What are we doing today, boys?”

Magnus raised his eyebrows at them both, “Date with Vilde”

Isak shrugged, turning to Jonas, “Just me and you then”

Jonas nodded, taking a big bite of his green onion pancake.

They chatted back and forth for a bit, Magnus again on about something he wanted to try in bed with Vilde but as usual, unsure about how it would go over and needing both Jonas and Isak to assure him never to voice this particular thought to Vilde unless he wanted a smack.

Magnus seemed to realize what time it was all of a sudden, because he jumped up and dashed off to get dressed, tossing a salute over his shoulder as he stepped out the door.

Jonas who was used to the whirlwind that was Magnus barely batted a lash but Isak gave him a bewildered look and they both burst into laughter.

Jonas sipped at his second coffee, “So, what’s up with you? First you’re pissed then you’re on cloud nine?”

Isak knew better than to try to play off his mood swings with Jonas, “I met someone. That guy you covered for me at the club fair”

Jonas nodded, “Figured that. So is there something going on with you two?”

Jonas was there when Isak had admitted to some interest in boys back in high school after meddling in his relationship with Eva. They hadn’t talk about it again, mostly because Isak continued to date girls and it was never relevant until now, but Isak still felt a touch self-conscious.

Isak shrugged, looking for the right words, “We’re scent compatible and I feel like I’d like to get to know him a lot better, but he’s got zero social media and his squad is super over-protective. I got his number from his best friend, that Sonja chick, but now that I have it, I’m not sure what to message him. It’s stupid, but I want to make a good impression”

Jonas listened, chin in his palm, “Well, you’ve already talked to him and we both know he kind of likes you already, or Sonja wouldn’t have given you his number. Those boys in his squad are all chill, so I’m guessing there’s something different about him?”

Isak nodded, “I’m pretty sure he’s an Omega”

Jonas’ impressive eyebrows inched up his forehead higher than Isak thought possible, “Fuck. That’s rare as hell. When did he present?”

Isak shrugged with his palms up, “No idea, but I’m pretty sure that it’s part of the reason that he has no social media. I creeped him hard and didn’t hardly find shit. His squad has a Youtube channel but the videos are almost all private”

Jonas nodded, “Youself told me they used to do skits and movie clips and stuff in high school. They are all really into artsy stuff: movie production, directing, acting, and musical scores. I’ve seen some of their improvisation stuff in class and they are pretty good, especially together. Even’s in Animation though, I think. He’s probably the only Omega ‘cause I’m almost positive they are all Alphas or Betas”

Isak nodded, “Which explains why they are so protective especially since they’ve been friends forever. But I’m not asking the guy to marry me, I just want to get to know him better”

Jonas sat back, “Actually, I’ve got an idea. What about Charades?”

Isak squinted, “I don’t get it”

Jonas grinned, “What about miming a date request like: Me”

Here Jonas pointed at himself, then, “You”

Here, he pointed to Isak, then, “Coffee”

Jonas indicated the coffee cup he was holding.

Isak laughed, “That’s so fucking corny it just might work”

Jonas gave him a knowing look, “You are asking an Art major how to impress another Art major. I got this”

Isak laughed some more, “Ok, smartass. Let’s do this”

~!@!~

Isak wanted to get started right away but Jonas reminded him that just because he was keen, didn’t mean he shouldn’t follow the rules. He insisted they shower and head out to the skate park, in part to look for cool places to take a few action shots and in part to distract Isak.

Isak had never been as good as Jonas at tricks but had discovered a love for long boards and just cruising at the end of high school.

Isak had borrowed some of Jonas’ clean clothes and was wearing his dark blue jeans from last night, with Jonas’ teal Odd Future all-over Donut hoodie, because Jonas insisted that blue was Isak’s color, and his leather snapback.

They got their first shot of Isak rolling past a large colorful mural at the skate park, pointing to himself and squinting in the sunlight, mostly looking like a goofball. Jonas vetoed the shot when Isak would have refused because the colors were admittedly awesome, and Isak did look pretty casual perched on his long-board. Isak didn’t want to look like he was trying too hard, even if he was.

They goofed off for another hour before Jonas then suggested they move on to the University because he needed to pick up some stuff at the campus bookstore.

Jonas got their next shot of Isak making fingers guns at him in the science section of the bookstore, another shot Isak tried to poo poo until Jonas drew his attention to his epic accidental Clint Eastwood half-wink-half-squint and the cool science section sign over his left shoulder.

They eventually got into trouble after Isak started a war by spraying Jonas with an open trial bottle of PooPourri and Jonas retaliated by trying to wrestle him down long enough to give him a wet willy. They were asked to scoot by an amused student store clerk.

Next, they went for Kebab. They rode the bus back to their high school neck of the woods and skated through their old school yard for nostalgia’s sake. They took a joint selfie at the back doors where they always used to meet, both pretending to look pensively into the distance, and posted it to the group chat.

At their favorite Kebab place, they stayed inside at a table though they usually took it to go and chilled at a spot nearby that had a good view of the main street in front of the school and had always been awesome for people watching in high school, weather permitting.

Jonas got the third shot of Isak when he held up his iced latte, as if to salute Jonas, just as their waiter set a cinnamon bun down in front of them. Isak liked this shot best, because he was smiling with his eyes and the timing could not have been more perfect.

It wasn’t until they were riding the bus back to Jonas’ that it occurred to Isak to thank Jonas.

True to form, his best friend totally shrugged it off: “I was happy to help. You’d do it for me and it’s been a while since I’ve seen you this hype about anyone; I’m just doing my part”

Isak pinched Jonas’ cheek, “Awww. Thanks best bud”

Jonas just smirked at him, “Just be sure to remember who started it all when you’re naming your first kid”

Jonas laughed himself stupid when some of Isak’s ice latte came out his nose when he choked on a sip.

~!@!~

Isak was glad Jonas helped him waste the day away so that he hadn’t texted Even first thing on Sunday morning and showed some chill. He was home now, and ready to dive into some readings for school. Isak could be hyper focused when he needed to be and having something to distract him while waiting for Even’s reply would be paramount to maintaining his sanity.

He opened a text to Even and inserted the three pictures he’d taken with Jonas’ help in the correct order and paused for a second, just breathing and wondering why he felt so nervous when he knew he’d interacted with Even already a handful of times and was sure this would probably go over really well.

He hit send and flipped his phone over.

He grabbed his highlighter and started in on the chapter about the heart for his elective Anatomy & Physiology class that he’d figured he’d just splice in so he wouldn’t be totally lost later if he decided to go the medicine route.

He’d read three paragraphs when his phone vibrated.

Isak’s heart hiccupped and he laughed at his nervousness for a second before forcing himself to put down his highlighter and turning over his phone.

The screen was already dark again, so he hit the home button.

Isak was expecting the reply to be from Even, because he hadn’t texted anybody else, but he still got giddy.

Isak opened the text:

 **_Even BN_ ** _: **Tomorrow?**_

Isak was surprised but in a pleasant way. It was nice to know he wasn’t the only keen one in the equation.

He didn’t want to let it show too much though so:

**IsakYaki: If you want. Whenever you’re free.**

Isak made to set his phone down again, thinking Even would take a minute but it pinged again.

**_Even BN:_ _Tomorrow but not on campus._ **

Isak knew Even probably had his reasons, but he also knew there was more to Even’s recent history then anybody was willing to say at the minute. He tried for a neutral theory:

**IsakYaki: Have to dodge security?**

**_Even BN:_ _Just know a really nice place. But yeah, that too._ **

**IsakYaki: Cool. But I’m paying.**

**_Even BN_ _: Why?_ **

**IsakYaki: Cardigan tax? I still have it.**

**_Even BN:_ _Wear it and you won’t forget._ **

**IsakYaki: Want it back that bad?**

**_Even BN:_ _No, but you keep using it as an excuse. I want to see what other game you have without it._ **

**IsakYaki** : **Harsh. Are you saying you want Maximum Effort? ‘Cause that’s a lot for a coffee date.**

**_Even BN:_ _Why’s that?_ **

**IsakYaki: *evil laugh* Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.**

**_Even BN:_ _I TAKE IT BACK!!!_ **

**IsakYaki: No, seriously, you’d like my max effort. It’s a good choice. Roll with it.**

**_Even BN_ _: Promise you won’t serenade me?_ **

**IsakYaki: You haven’t been serenaded already? That’s a crime**

**_Even BN:_ _Stop it lol_ **

**_Even BN:_ _I really liked those pics, btw. Pretty creative. I like that you’re in a different place during different parts of the day._ **

Isak definitely owed Jonas one now, seeing as how he’d been bang on about Even liking the little extra art-fart effort.

**IsakYaki: I had help. I needed you to take one look and say ‘YASS!’**

**_Even BN:_ _I’m just glad you didn’t wait too long._ **

**IsakYaki: Yeah, waiting is for kids. Besides, I waited all day. That was lots**

**_Even BN:_ _I waited all day for you too. I was thinking maybe Sonja gave you a wrong number_ **

**IsakYaki: She’s awesome, fyi. Like your friendly neighbourhood badass. Is she Alpha?**

**_Even BN:_ _LMFAO_ **

**_Even BN:_ _No. She’s been like that our whole lives though._ **

**_Even BN:_ _We used to get into a lot of shit together, before Mikael_ **

**IsakYaki: I actually thought she was your girlfriend before and I got kind of Alpha about it**

**IsakYaki: She gives off some vibes, you know?**

**_Even BN:_ _Yeah, she’s pretty cool_ **

**IsakYaki: I creeped her Insta. She’s a busy girl**

**IsakYaki: Not that I’m trying to creep**

**_Even BN:_ _Just normal curiosity. Social media is a thing_ **

**_Even BN:_ _And before you ask why I have none, I’ll explain when I can. It’s still kind of complicated_ **

**IsakYaki: I figured there was a reason. I’m just happy to have your number**

**_Even BN_ _: Sonja must like you. She’s as paranoid about my privacy as I am_ **

**IsakYaki: She also warned me your boys would rip me a new one if I screwed up so…**

**_Even BN:_ _#jokingnotjoking_ **

**IsakYaki: Noted. I need more deets about where to meet you tho**

**_Even BN:_ _Like the address or do you want to go together?_**

**IsakYaki: The address. I need the mystery of a grand entrance.**

**_Even BN:_ _Is this part of that Max effort thing?_**

**IsakYaki: Yup.**

**IsakYaki:** **Hold-up: Can I be low-key creepy for a second?**

**_Even BN:_ _…yes?_**

**IsakYaki: It’s less creepy if I warn you first, fyi. Cut a guy some slack…**

**_Even BN:_ _What is it?_**

Here, Isak paused. Normally, when you had a crush on someone, you could creep their social media and Isak had been there and tried to do that already so he knew it was a dead end and now that it was confirmed that Even was incognito on purpose, Isak knew he’d have to bite the bullet and ask.

**IsakYaki: Can you send me a picture? Of you? You’ve got three of me and the whole internet to browse so it’s only fair, right?**

**_Even BN:_ _…_ **

Isak watched the bubble that indicated Even was typing pop up and down twice, for long seconds, then finally nothing. After another few moments, Isak realized that maybe he was asking too much, too soon from someone who obviously valued their privacy fiercely and had hinted more than once that it was warranted.

Isak was about to text back that it was okay and to forget about it when Even finally replied.

With a picture.

Even was sitting up in a large yellow high-back wing chair, legs crossed and a small dog lounging in his lap. He was wearing soft grey sweats and thick socks, the angle of the picture tilted downwards while Even smiled shyly up into the camera. In the corner of the picture, Isak could make out that Even looked sat by a large dark window and the edge of what looked like one of those new-school vinyl record players. Isak marveled at how homey Even looked, his hair in his eyes and a hand on the dog.

Isak privately thought it was a bit ridiculous for a boy to be as cute, if not cuter, than a girl could be and it was strange to know that Even hadn’t always been this soft. Probably all that changed after his presentation. Isak wondered just how much it had changed Even and how much Even himself had been aware of the changes. Isak wondered if he could have tolerated such a drastic change himself. It seemed obvious to him that he could only ever have been Alpha or Beta, but maybe he could have been Omega in the right circumstances, if nature had seen fit.

Isak’s musings are interrupted by another text.

**_Even BN:_ _I won’t send nudes if that’s what you’re after._ **

**IsakYaki: Never mind about nudes. You’re so fucking cute, it’s stupid actually**

**_Even BN_ _: …_ **

**IsakYaki: You’re gonna have to learn how to take a compliment**

**_Even BN:_ _It’s just…_ **

**_Even BN:_ _Can you be cute if you’re 6’2?_ **

**_Even BN:_ _Or have skin like a teenager going through puberty AGAIN?!?!_ **

**_Even BN:_ _Or have irrational urges to make pillow forts every time it’s that time of the month?_ **

**IsakYaki: Uh YES? That’s all cute shit**

**_Even BN:_ _Do you ever stop?_ **

**IsakYaki: No? And you like it, so…**

**_Even BN:_ _OK. THAT’S ENOUGH. I’m dead already, lol_ **

**IsakYaki: lol, chill**

**IsakYaki: We can call it here if you’ve actually had enough, you know? I like doing this in person way better anyway. Text can’t adequately communicate my natural animal magnetism, you know?**

**_Even BN_ _:…Did I already mention that I can’t with you?_ **

**IsakYaki: You might have? I’m not sure.**

**_Even BN_ _: I’ll text you the address tomorrow._ **

**_Even BN_ _: Goodnight, Isak_ **

**IsakYaki: Goodnight Even**

~!@!~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope to have part two up by the weekend! Cheers in advance for the comments and kudos!


	6. Tongue-In-Cheek Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Musical Inspo:
> 
> The date – Paris and Simo ‘Evermore’ (ft. Gabrielle Current & FINNEAS) & Novelties ‘Pillow Talk’  
> Shit hitting the fan – Billie Eilish ‘Bury a friend’ & Vintage Culture/Adam K ‘Pour over’

~!@!~

Chapter 6: Tongue –in-Cheek

Part 2

~!@!~

[Monday]

Isak was a little low-key excited to have found a spare moment to talk to Jonas about his date with Even while they waited for the boys.

Jonas gave him a knowing look, “So he loved the pictures? Man, you own me a kebab”

Isak laughed, “I can do that”

Jonas wiggled his eyebrows in that obnoxious way that was both endearing and reminded anyone looking that Jonas’ eyebrows were _almost_ living things, “Got it all mapped out?”

Isak made a face, “I was up late studying and it was twice as hard to concentrate after texting Even. He’s actually picking the place so part of it is out of my hands already”

Jonas tutted, “If you aren’t taking charge from the start, you can already see what it’s going to be like later”

Isak gave him mock-affronted look, “It’s not about being in charge, Jonas. It’s about respecting his integrity as a person”

Jonas blinked for a moment and Isak tried very, very hard not to laugh. They both gave up at the same time when Jonas’ lip twitched.

Jonas smiled kind of conspiratorially, “You know, you haven’t been this love struck in a long time”

Isak was about to answer, to protest that Jonas was making too big a deal out of it, when a shadow fell over the table. Both he and Jonas looked up and Isak recognized Emma immediately, having met her twice now already.

She stood somewhat awkwardly, caught just as she was opening her mouth to speak, and froze when her eyes met Isak’s.

Jonas shaded his eyes as he looked between them, “Hey”

Isak still hadn’t said anything, the brim of his snapback shielding his eyes, while he decided how to play this. He knew he wasn’t into her, not like she was into him if her behaviour at the house party on Saturday night was anything to go by, but he also knew that from personal experience that it wasn’t recommended to piss off a girl if you could help it; some of them could hold grudges forever.

He settled on neutral, opting for the same casual ‘Hey’ as Jonas.

If Emma had noticed the beat of silence before Isak had greeted her, she didn’t let on, instead smiling widely, “I missed you at the after-party. Everybody went out and it was so much fun”

Isak could sense she was fishing, “I know. When I was smoking with Sonja, Jonas texted me about something that was going on with the boys so I bailed”

Jonas, great best friend that he was, didn’t miss a beat and nodded when Emma glanced at him, “Parents were out of town at a friend’s house”

Emma nodded, as if approving of his answer, “That’s cool; it happens. I was wondering if you and your friends wanted to come to a party at mine, end of the week?”

Isak knew that they didn’t have plans this early on but also didn’t want his prime time taken up with stuff when he was hoping to use his time more productively.

He looked to Jonas, who shrugged and smiled good-naturedly, as if to say: ‘Your call, man’

He was saved from answering when Madhi and Magnus rolled up.

Magnus, ever witty and charming, immediately became the elephant in the room when he opened his mouth, “Boys, are you seriously attracting chicks just sitting here?”

Isak watched Jonas face-palm out of the corner of his eye and Madhi rolled his before nodding to Emma, “Hello again. What are we chatting about?”

Emma told them about the party she was hosting, “There’s a few people with birthdays this month in my class, including me, and it seemed like a good enough reason to throw a party, minus the birthday cake”

Isak scoffed, “No one is ever too old for cake”

Emma surprised Isak by flipping the script and getting a touch sassy, “Then you can bring one, when you come. I’ll message you the details on Messenger. Cool?”

She didn’t leave much room to argue, as if challenging him to bail out of a call-out like that, and Isak was about to rain on her parade just for fun and say he’d just remembered plans that he had made and forgotten when Magnus jumped in with a question about it being her birthday.

Isak could admit that if it had been Even giving him sass, he probably would have thought it cute and not snarky, but overall, it hardly mattered. Isak knew that he wouldn’t been going to this thing, even if he didn’t have other plans, if only not to give Emma any ideas. He hadn’t stayed home and marathon-ed some Fifa in a while and he hated to think that he might be getting rusty.

Emma turned to answer the question and Isak caught sight of the man of the hour over her shoulder walking with Elias and Yousef. Even was taller than them both but managed to look totally at home between the two of them as they headed in the direction of the cafeteria. His hair was held off his face with a headband and he was bundled up in a retro pullover sweater and light jeans. By contrast, both his boys wore dark colors. They were laughing as Elias gestured wildly and Isak felt himself smiling as he watched them disappear inside.

Isak was musing that it was the first time he’d noticed Even on campus when Madhi waved a hand in front of his face, “Earth to Isak”

Isak looked up from under the brim of his snapback and could see that all eyes were on him: Jonas was smirking, doubtlessly having seen Even too; Madhi had his eyebrows raised in question; Magnus was looking back and forth between him and Emma; and Emma looked expectant.

Isak shrugged, “Thanks for the invite; we’ll put it on the calendar”

Emma looked disappointed about that non-comital answer and Magnus made a face at Isak over her shoulder.

They said their goodbyes and Magnus immediately rounded on Isak when Emma was just barely out of earshot, “What the fuck, Isak?!”

Isak shrugged again, not answering.

Madhi imitated Isak, shrugging too, “What’s up man? You tried to bail on her at the party too. She’s cute and into you and you used me deliberately to cock-block”

Jonas threw Isak under the bus with a smile, “Newsflash boys: he’s got his eye on somebody else”

Isak gave Jonas an incredulous look and tried not to look guilty when Madhi and Magnus rounded on him.

Magnus looked ready to explode and Madhi slapped his hand over Magnus’ mouth before turning his eyes back to Isak, “Why didn’t you say so?”

Isak fiddled for a moment and avoided Jonas’ look, “It’s not really a thing yet. We literally just started texting yesterday”

Madhi whipped his hand away from Magnus’ face, “Gross man”

Magnus laughed as Madhi wiped his hand on Magnus’ sweater and Magnus let him.

Isak’s face scrunched up when he realized that Magnus had licked Madhi’s palm, “Vom”

Jonas cringed too, “Where did we find you again?”

Magnus ignored all of this, focused on the matter at hand, “Is she hot?”

Isak froze up unintentionally as Jonas gave him a pointed look.

Isak tried for obtuse, squinting and shrugging at the same time, “Define hot”

Magnus scoffed, “Hotter than Emma?”

Isak nodded absently as Jonas continued to give him laser eyes.

Madhi jumped in, “Where did you meet?”

“At the Student Health Clinic”, Isak supplied, still mentally looking for a safe way to avoid the accusation in Jonas’ eyes for not mentioning that his ‘she’ was actually a ‘he’.

Magnus laughed, strangely delighted in that way that made him mostly endearing, “You would score time with a chick while on an actual mission”

Madhi looked thoughtful, “So that’s why no interest in Emma”

Isak breathed a sigh of relief as Jonas gave up the accusatory eyes, “Bingo. Different fish to fry, you know?”

Magnus nodded, “Are we going to this thing Friday then?”

Isak turned his snapback on backwards, tugging slightly on the brim to pull his bangs firmly off his face, “I mean, you guys can go. I’ll message you the deets as soon as Emma sends them to me. I’m not your keeper”

Madhi laughed at the scandalized expression on Magnus’ face when he realized that Isak was bailing.

Jonas pointedly spoke up, eyebrow arched in a challenge, “So when do we get to meet this new girl?”

Isak feigned cool, “When I get things figured out”

Both Madhi and Magnus were satisfied with that but Isak could tell Jonas was unimpressed with him for not really telling the boys what was going on.

Isak knew he was making the right choice though. It was too early to tell them something that had the potential to change their friendship when he wasn’t even sure if his interest in Even would even equate to something beyond passing fancy.  

Besides, if he said it now, he’d never hear the end of it from Magnus who needed things explained in minute detail, especially when it came as a shock. Isak would need way more caffeine, privacy, and enthusiasm for that conversation than what he had in his stores right now. He knew that when he texted Jonas later to explain, he’d understand.

Right now, he just wanted to chill and take it easy.

The boys eventually moved on to other conversation and Isak was safe to space out and think until his next class.

~!@!~

Isak did feel pretty good by the end of the day but he conceded to the fact that he was overall still somewhat nervous.

Isak realized that this might be the first time his famous nerves of steel were kind of failing him since high school. Isak had done the whole awkward, petty, angsty teenager thing for a bit before he’d presented, but since then, he’d essentially become surer of himself and doubly aware of his limitations. It had been like getting a dose of insta-chill, maturity, and self-awareness all in one and he’d learned to appreciate the evolution pretty quickly.

That said, he was still nervous. He knew it was because even though Even seemed like a sure thing, in a way, Isak wanted from Even things that didn’t usually didn’t extend past a couple of dates or hookups. He’d caught himself wondering about shit like when Even’s birthday was and if he skied because winter was coming. He’d thought about the fact that Even would likely get a long great with the boys and that he’d be a hit with Eva’s squad too. He wondered what his mom might think of Even and if he wanted to mention anything to his dad or not.

Isak was well aware that he was catching feelings pre-maturely, but he also hadn’t ever been this invested in anyone before or had his gut leading the way before his head. It was interesting to still have his wits about him and yet want to act entirely on instinct.

But Isak decided to put all that aside and focus on tonight.

After his last class, he made a beeline for the shopping center by the apartment to pick up one thing he needed before heading home. He squirreled his prize into the fridge as soon as he got home and noted that Eskild was out, which was bonus because that man could smell excitement from a mile away, and Linn was holed up in her room.

Isak made a quick mental note of some readings and an online quiz he needed to do before he left and had a quick browse through his closet. He knew exactly what he was going to wear: his black skinnies that did his legs every justice possible and his silver-gray button down. He decided on a black undershirt and knew he’d have to do something with his hair. He’d had it long all over in high school, but had started getting the sides cut short over the summer before Uni. He had a tiny cowlick at the front that tended to flip his curls to the right but it mostly worked out okay. He turned his head right and left in the bathroom mirror and noted that it was starting to curl over his ears again so he was due for a cut but that it was also that perfect in between length he could work with for tonight.

He was meeting Even just after suppertime, so he had plenty of time to fuss.

He made a quick sandwich and settled into his schoolwork for the next hour and a bit and then decided on a quick nap, setting his alarm for 20 minutes.

Isak woke when it rang and stayed in bed for a few minutes, just thinking things over.

This was happening.

He was going on a date with Even.

He was showered and dressed in record time and almost ready to leave when he remembered to grab Even’s cardigan. He pulled it off the top of his dresser, where he’d folded and put it away after it had dried, and wiggled into it. He decided to roll the sleeves up on both the cardigan and the button down to go more ‘Hot librarian’ than ‘Cat Lady’ and was satisfied with the look overall. He styled his hair pretty loosely, knowing that it was getting cold enough in the evenings that product was starting to freeze when he was overly ambitious anyway.

He checked his pockets for his keys, wallet, and Blistex, and grabbed his surprise from the fridge and borrowed Eskild’s black tote to hide it in.

Then, he was out the door and on the bus.

Google directions dictated that Isak would have to switch buses once then walk about ten minutes to where he was headed and the trip would take just under a half hour. Isak was curious what kind of place Even had chosen, even more so when he realized that he was headed to the older part of downtown.

After his second bus switch, he passed the time by admiring the lights downtown. It was going to be Halloween in about a week and there were a few decorations out.

He got off where Google indicated and moseyed up the street, looking into the lit store windows and kitschy boutiques along the way. The place he was looking for had a strange address and he was surprised when Google announced his arrival when he reached a large wooden door between two boutiques. It had a pull handle, so Isak did just that, and it opened into a well-lit landing and a set of stairs heading down. The walls in the staircase where the mix of stone, brick, and mortar that the older buildings were originally made of, and Isak could see the wiring that looped from light fixture to light fixture as it lit the way down.

As Isak neared the bottom, he could hear people talking, though low and quiet, and someone playing the piano. He realized that this was a kind of lounge bar, maybe, and stopped just inside the propped-open double doors to look in.

It was lit with dim yellow lights and Chinese lanterns and there was a slightly raised stage in the center where an older woman played slowly at a baby grand piano. Isak wondered how it had been brought in, since the stairway down would have been too narrow, and next noted the small tables dotted around the stage, mostly two seaters by the looks of it. The bar took up all of the back wall and there was a small space cleared in front of it where an older couple danced slowly. It was all glowing red Mahogany and old school chic and Isak could totally see whey Even would love a place like this.

It was also almost half empty, this being a Monday night, which suited Isak just fine. His Max effort didn’t need the competition of a busy bar.

Speaking of which: Isak next spotted Even, seated with his back to Isak, at a table just to the right of the stage.

Even’s jacket was draped over the back of his chair and he was drumming his fingers along the table edge, maybe a bit nervously, and had his head tilted as if trying to listen more closely to the piano. He was still wearing what Isak had seen him in early in the day: his Retro Air Max Nikes, light blue jeans, and a long sleeve polo which was understandably casual. Isak took a breath and walked to where Even was sitting.

He picked his way through the tables and set his hands on Even’s shoulders, feeling him jump, and leaned down over him to look into his face upside down, “Hi!”

Even smiled at him, “Hi”

Isak scooted around to the other chair, setting the tote down, and hung his jacket on the back of his chair like Even.

He took a seat dramatically and immediately set his chin in the palm of his right hand with his elbow propped up on the table, “I’m not late, am I? You look like you’ve been here a little while”

Even shook his head, “My mom works around here so we had an early supper and I told her I was meeting someone”

Isak made a surprised face, “Is she the type that might ambush us?”

Even laughed, “No. She co-owns this place, actually, so all the staff know me and will keep an eye out. In case you were planning to be so extra I needed saving”

Isak refused to let that sink in too far because he’d promised Even his max effort and chickening out now was not par for the course. Instead, he put his tote on the table, “I brought you a present”

Even got flustered, “You didn’t have to. I didn’t bring you anything”

Isak shushed him with a look, “Ok, maybe present isn’t the right word. It’s an icebreaker”

Even tilted his head, looking confused, “Icebreaker? Isn’t that a team building exercise thing?”

Isak nodded, “Yes, and put that judge-y tone away. When you are meeting somebody you don’t know very well, you need an icebreaker so that the conversation starts off on the right foot. This is my icebreaker. Works every time”

Now Even looked curious, “Ok?”

Isak smirked, “Just trust me. Shut your eyes until I tell you”

Even gave him a skeptical but amused look and sat up straight and shut his eyes.

Isak removed his prize from the tote, keeping an eye on Even’s face as he removed the protective wrapping and Even frowned, hearing the crinkle. Isak then moved it slightly closer to Even and positioned it just so. He sat back for a second, crossing his arms over his chest and admiring Even’s charmingly nervous expression.

Isak was about to tell Even to open his eyes when the pianist made a soft sound, “How charming”

Isak turned to grin at her and then back to Even, “Open your eyes”

Even opened one eye tentatively, then the other, and Isak took in the genuine surprise on Even’s face as he realized what he was looking at.

It was an edible arrangement of flowers: roses made out of slices of watermelon and butterflies made of grapes and slices of apple with smaller flowers cut out of honeydew. Isak knew it was just about the cheesiest thing he could have brought with him, but his mom had always loved them. She used to say that you got the wow factor of presenting a bouquet of flowers while also being able to eat and share them so they wouldn’t go to waste the way real flowers would.

Even starred for so long, Isak had to prompt him, “Well?”

Even smiled slowly, and Isak knew it was the right amount of cheesy by the way it reached Even’s eyes, “I didn’t know this was a thing”

Isak nodded sagely, “It’s a thing. So the next bit is we eat it, but while we’re eating, we ask each other as many questions as there are flowers”

Even looked scandalized, “Do we have to eat it?”

Isak grinned, “That’s the point, yeah”

Even looked sheepish for a second, “It looks too nice to eat. Can I take a picture?”

Isak couldn’t resist ribbing him a bit, “Are you one of those?”

Even made a face at him, but took the picture anyway, “I’ve never seen one before. It’s really different. No one’s ever given me anything like this”

Isak smirked, “I hope not. This is a level of cheesy reserved for married couples or what you bring your grandma when you haven’t visited in forever, but you wanted the Max Effort experience, so this is step one”

Even smiled at him again, “You’re a little too good at this”

Isak played for chill but he was preening inside, “I’m okay at it”

Even gave him a look and they both laughed.

Isak scooted his chair closer to the table, “So, in keeping with tradition, you get first pick”

Even was eyeing one of the watermelon roses and Isak couldn’t resist a little color commentary, “That’s a one-big-bite situation, if you were wondering. Watermelon is kinda messy”

Even gave him an amused look but did exactly that.

Isak picked a honeydew cut-out, “Now, you ask a question”

Even hesitated, then: “If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be?”

Isak made a show of thinking it over, “Cliché. I like it”

Even gave him a long look.

Isak laughed, “Ok, ok, real talk: probably my temper? I’ve always been a little temperamental. I was a sensitive, angsty type in high school, before I presented, and that translated into these big bold ‘Mine!’ and ‘Hulk smash!’ feelings when I got Alpha. It’s something I’m low-key embarrassed about, if we are being full disclosure here, because I try to think with my head and sometimes it just fails me. Flat out leaves me high and dry. I mean, being bullheaded works when arguing with Sana about what merits of the endocrine system we should focus on in our paper, but it’s not so great when it makes me jump to conclusions in everyday situations”

Isak shrugged and Even pursed his lips, “Honest. I like it”

Isak laughed and leaned forward to pluck one of the watermelon roses for himself, “Okay: my turn. What nerdy art thing don’t you already do that you wish you did?”

Even laughed, sliding a slice of apple from a grape-apple butterfly into his mouth and chewing for a second, “I wish I knitted or crocheted”

Isak’s eyebrows climbed into his hairline and he laughed, “What?”

Even was wide eyed and nodding in a ‘yeah, laugh it up’ kind of way, “No, I’m dead fucking serious. You know how girls always complain they are cold? That is my whole life since I presented. I’m always thinking about how I can be warm or how I will get warm or how I will keep warm or how I can get warmer then I already am. Not joking. My gran used to knit epic stuff, before the arthritis in her hands got really bad, and it was a skill that I never thought I’d want to learn. She’s tried to teach me, but her hands aren’t as steady as they used to be so it’s been slow going”

Isak nodded, “Okay…I can see it. I mean, we have been going back and forth about this cardigan for a hot minute so now I better understand the fixation”

Even shrugged, “It looks good on you”

Isak smiled, “Yes, but it’s essential for your daily warmth so on that note, before I forget, lemme give it back”

Isak unrolled his sleeves and freed the cardigan from around his shoulders to hand it across the table to Even who accepted it and laid it across his lap.

They both reached for another piece of fruit at the same time and chewed, their eyes meeting for a second and Isak winked at Even and stuffed another piece into his mouth and then a third when Even’s expression got so scandalized he almost chocked when he started to laugh.

He did end up laughing pretty freely when Even yanked the fruit out of his reach, “You own me three questions, jerk”

Isak made the ‘Go ahead’ motion with his hand, still laughing a little.

Even set the arrangement to his left, still well out of reach, “Most embarrassing thing someone got confused about you”

Isak pretended to bite his fist, “Going for the jugular. Wow…ok, lemme think?”

Isak crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in his chair, tilting his face to the ceiling and closing his eyes, “Ok, so the girls convinced me to do drag for Halloween in our final year of high school. And when I say girls, I mean Sana’s squad. I’d lost a bet with Vilde of all people, who I have not fucked with since, and they went nuts over it. They made me an alter ego, Isabel, and like waxed me and did my makeup and forced me to go out in public”

Isak cracked an eye and looked over at Even when he heard an honest-to-God giggle, “Yeah, laugh. It was only my dignity as a man that got mistreated that night. Anyway: so we go out and we run into people we know. Of course, right? Because I have the shittiest luck in the whole world. And there’s this guy that I actually had classes with and had talked to enough that he was more than an acquaintance, but less than a friend, you know? And he was drunk, like hit-on-your-mom-and-dance-in-the-street drunk, and he hit on me **all fucking night**. And his boys were like ‘Yo, Bro, you don’t want none of that’ and I was trying so hard to get away from this guy but he had tentacles for arms and endurance that could be bottled and sold. So, end of the night and **Sana** , _picture this for a second_ , has to get all fierce-designated-driver-not-leaving-my-girl-behind on this guy and we finally, finally get the hell out and go home”

Even is dying, eyes crinkled closed and grinning ear to ear.

Isak pretends not to notice and clears his throat before resuming, “So, of course, my shifty luck is still on point come Monday and this guy and I have class first thing in the morning together. And I was sure that he was so drunk there was no way in hell that he would remember it was me. But he’s telling me about his Friday night and this gorgeous girl with big eyes and blond hair and he looks up into my face and I see the exact second he realizes it was me. I think he was scarred forever, and he stopped talking to me after that, but not because he was mad, but because he would get really embarrassed and shy, if you can believe it”

Isak shrugged and concluded the tale with a smirk, “And that’s how I became some guy’s transsexual fantasy for a bit”

Even surprised Isak by bursting into bright peals of laughter that had Isak laughing a little too.

When he calmed somewhat, Even started wiping tears from his eyes, “10 out of 10, that just made the date. Ask me out again, anytime. Sold”

Isak shrugged, “That’s honestly one of the most ridiculous things that’s ever happened to me so if you are entertained instead of freaked out, I’ll take it”

Even had stopped laughing, but seemed to pause and remember what he’d just heard, and broke out again. Isak realized that he must really like Even because getting laughed at, on a date no less, wasn’t making him regret his decision to tell the story in the slightest. In fact, he enjoyed the way Even laughed so much he almost, almost considered telling Even about the time he and Jonas had caught Magnus testing whipped cream and chocolate sauce on himself before a weekend away with Vilde, or the time Sana caught Madhi teaching Isak how to put on a hijab and she schooled them both about how it was done.

Finally, Even stopped laughing and smiled shyly at Isak, sheepish, “Sorry”

Isak shrugged, “Best reaction I’ve ever had to telling that story so, no worries. What’s your next question?”

Even blinked a few times, as if only just remembering the game they were playing that prompted this confession of Isak’s, “Should we keep going?”

Isak smiled, “I mean, this is the only chance you’re gonna get to get this stuff out of me the easy way”

They are interrupted by a waitress approaching, a short but pretty red head covered in freckles that somehow seemed mainly clustered in the center of her face, who was holding a serving tray.

Even looked surprised and Isak obligingly cleared a spot on the small table for her to set it down.

The waitress whose nametag read ‘Amelia’, winked at Even and fished some cutlery out of her apron, “Curtesy of the owner”

Even groaned, “Did she call?”

Amelia grinned at him, “Just to ask about the restocking tomorrow”

Even gave her a squinty look and she laughed, “And to ask if you were still here”

Isak noted that it was a big brass colored serving tray that shone warmly in the low light of the place, with a high, domed lid and wondered what it could be.

Amelia also fished a note out of her pocket that she set on the table in front of Even, “Flag me down if you need anything; I’ll put this in the fridge”

With that, she made off with the rest of the edible arrangement and disappeared through a set of dark double doors to the left of the large bar that Isak hadn’t noticed before. Isak also realized that the pianist must have retired a little while ago as she now sat perched at the bar having a bite to eat and chatting with the bartender. There were also a handful more people sprinkled around the other tables, all nursing what must be night cap drinks and chatting low and privately to each other.

Even looked conflicted for a minute as he unfolded and read the note Amelia had left for him. His eyes skimmed it once, then again, before his expression became tinged with slight annoyance and Isak felt the change in the atmosphere that it had created, “Everything ok?”

Even looked thoughtfully up at Isak, as if assessing, and handed him the note overtop the serving tray.

Isak accepted it; it read: ‘Glad to hear you are having fun. Have a bite to eat before you come home, but try to be back within the hour so I won’t be lying to Dad when I said I checked in with you and you are on your way home soon’

Even blew out a long breath, “Its things like this that remind me how different everything is now”

Isak kind of had an idea of what Even meant and his expression must have said as much, but he could see Even had his own opinions, “It’s late-ish anyway. If I have school in the morning, you probably do too”

Even sort of half shrugged, “But it’s not _that_ late, you know? Presenting changed the way my parents treated me, unintentionally probably, but I can’t be out late without them wondering if I’m okay or who I’m with. When I was in high school, I’d take off with my friends all the time and it wasn’t a big deal but now my mom calls Elias’ mom to make arrangements whenever I go over, like you would for your kid in middle school. And while that’s embarrassing, my dad treating me like I’m 13 again is even more weird, like presenting reset everything so he’s having to start from scratch or something. Like he hasn’t already raised me forever already. I know they mean well but it’s like I can’t ever go too long without being reminded that now that I‘m different, everything has to be different too, even if that’s not what I want”

Isak nodded, “I mean, if I say I get it, that might be a stretch but it’s a learning curve for most people even when the presentation is an easy one like mine. But look at it this way: at least you have people that care a lot about you. My mom did her best but she had her own issues and my dad is the wishy washy type”

Isak was aware that he was downplaying the true depth of the drama that was his family situation but this wasn’t the time or the place.

Even made a face, “I know that. It doesn’t change the way I feel though”

Isak could tell this was a delicate subject but he made one last effort, “Listen, isn’t it more about controlling the way you respond to what’s happening then it is about trying to control what you have no control over? Even science and philosophy allow for the fact that sometimes there simply is no control, like with Chaos Theory and things like Cancer, and you are expected to wing it. Life is dynamic so it’s constantly changing; it’s in flux. You can’t prevent that. And from experience I can say that anything that is a big deal now will only be a big deal until the next big thing comes along to take its place. It’s probably easier to adjust the way you digest stress and deal with things that upset you than it is to change those things that trigger you, right? Because you’ll never know how you might react unless a situation presents itself. Like, I’ll only know if you were serious about another date when I accompany you home and try for a kiss and you let me, right?”

Isak paused for a second, feigning nonchalance, and took in Even’s bemused but pleased expression, “So now that we’ve hashed that out, should we see what this is? Isn’t it probably getting cold?”

Even made a mock affronted face that dissolved into a smile when Isak very deliberately blinked slowly at him and gestured to the tray. It turned out to be some kind of stuffed ravioli, mainly seafood, with a surprise egg yolk in one.

They ate mostly in silence, trading looks over the steaming plate and Isak liked that they didn’t need to be talking for it to be comfortable.

Even also seemed a lot less tense when Isak made a joke about getting him home on time and they left the lounge to walk to the bus stop together, arms linked and hands stuffed in pockets to ward off the slight chill.

Even led them to a different bus stop then the one Isak had ridden to get here and they grabbed a seat way in the back when the bus came. Even slumped down so he could lean his head on Isak’s shoulder.

Isak grinned at Even, “Why do you do that?”

Even blinked and turned large blue eyes up to Isak, “Do what?”

Isak thumbed Even’s bottom lip, “Try to make yourself smaller”

Isak shifted, Even’s forehead coming to rest against his throat, Even’s voice almost a whisper, “I want to be little and cute, so you’ll like me better”

Isak turned his nose into Even’s hair, noting the pop of bergamot and lemongrass that had turned into his favorite smell overnight, “Can’t you tell how wrapped around your little fingers I am already?”

Even didn’t say anything back but his smell hovered over them both, pleasant and soft.

They eventually got off the bus somewhat uptown, about twenty minutes after they first got on, and Even led the way through upscale suburbia to an ultra-modern standalone Greystone townhouse, about three storeys high with huge frosted windows and a narrow, but manicured front lawn. Isak noted the bit of whimsy inspired by the Avocado green double front door, also with large glazed glass panels.  

They had linked arms on the walk to Even’s house and strolled casually up the road with Isak taking comically wide steps, or sometimes short shuffling ones, to wordlessly tease Even for trying too hard to match their pace with the slight difference in their height. He hadn’t been paying much attention to their surroundings until Even stopped and nodded to the house in question, “Welcome to casa Bech-Naesheim”

Isak noted that it was nothing like the tidy row houses that he had grown up in with the neighbours he’d shared walls with and was again reminded that he and Even did come from different backgrounds, though Even was effortlessly low-key about it in the way that people without certain problems could be.

Isak could see the light above the front door was on and that the windows on the uppermost floor also glowed dimly with light from inside. As he stood, head tilted back to take in the house, Even slipped his arm from Isak’s, “Can you wait here? Like half a second?”

Isak must have looked surprised because Even blushed and mumbled his way through a hurried explanation: “I want to go in and grab my dog for a walk. My parents will know I’m back and we can hang out a little longer”

Isak could see now that he’d never get over tall, model-pretty Even being awkward and earnest like this and tried to be as casual as possible with a soft, “Sure”

Even beamed at him, the smile reaching his eyes and his canines showing, and tugged Isak towards the house, veering off to the right as they got closer. Around to the side, Isak trailed after Even up a narrow pathway that came to a large wooden side-door. Even pulled a set of keys from is back pocket and opened the door, leading them into a sort of closet-like alcove. 

As soon as Isak was over the threshold, Even shutting the door behind them, he was accosted by loud barking coming from somewhere inside the house and coming closer. It sounded like a big dog, and Isak turned wide eyes on Even who only pressed his finger to his lips, smiling all the while, with the universal sign-language to hush and stay quiet.

Isak could hear the scamper of clawed paws on wood floor and braced himself as a ball of black and white fur rounded the corner at breakneck speed, still barking loudly. Isak was surprised when he saw that the loud bark was coming from a small dog. Said dog was currently sniffing around Isak’s sneakers, little stub tail wagging. Isak could see that the little guy was likely under forty pounds with white socks, chest markings and a white beard. Isak crouched and pet the dog, and was delighted when the dog gave him paw.

Isak looked up to Even who was peeking around the doorway into the house. Even glanced at Isak and mouthed, ‘Stay here’.

Even disappeared around the corner and the little dog abandoned Isak to follow after Even.

Isak held his breath, listening intently, and could hear Even talking quietly to someone. Their voices soon dimmed as they moved away from Isak.

Isak almost had a stroke when his phone pinged out loud with a message. He scrambled for it to set it to vibrate, listening close for whether or not it had alerted anyone who was nearby.

Slowly, he let his breath out when a few minutes passed is blissful silence.

To steady his nerves, he glanced down at his phone and almost laughed when he saw that the notification was from Emma with the details of how to get to her house and the proposed start time. He copied and pasted the message into the group chat with the boys and Magnus chimed in immediately but Isak closed the chat and was about to put his phone away when Jonas shot him a text:

**J: Why didn’t you tell the boys today at lunch?**

Isak rolled his eyes but knew that he was better off chatting with Jonas now than risking his wrath in person later:

**IsakYaki: Not ready. You forget that you are the only one that even knows there is a chance I could like someone like Even in the first place. Why blow myself up if Even and I don’t even get that far?**

Isak waited a beat and Jonas replied:

**J: I get that part, I just don’t want you to think that it’s something to be ashamed of. The boys are your friends too, Isak. They won’t stop being your friend because you might like a compatible Omega that just happens to be a guy. The same way they probably wouldn’t judge you for liking a guy that wasn’t an Omega either. Do you get what I’m saying?**

Jonas had a point but it didn’t make the idea of admitting openly that he was into boys any easier. What Emma had said at the party was still hovering over him and he could understand that there was a large part of it that was fear or shame, but he also knew that he needed the chance to be sure. This was unmapped territory and he didn’t want to be hurried through it. He wanted a chance to examine his feelings and work at being comfortable with this, if this became a huge part of his life. He would never be like Eskild but he wanted to be comfortable in his skin.

Isak bit his lip.

**IsakYaki: I know that too but I still want to wait. I want to spend some time with Even. If everything is chill, I’ll even introduce him to you guys and we can hang out soon-ish**

Jonas sent him a thumbs up, then:

**J: Just have some faith in the boys okay? If you can’t trust us, who can you trust?**

Isak knew Jonas knew him well enough that he knew the impact that those words would have. Isak’s personal stability had its foundation in his circle of friends, especially after his dad had remarried and his mom’s mental breakdown. He would have spiralled totally out of control if not for the boys when they’d had front row seats when Isak had presented and his short fuse had gotten even shorter, at first. They hadn’t dropped him then, so they wouldn’t now. Isak could appreciate that.

He was deciding what to reply when Even swung back into view with his dog on a leash and harness, smiling, “Had to make small talk with my parents. C’mon, we’ve got thirty minutes and I want to show you something”

Isak obligingly stepped back into the cool evening with Even right behind him. Isak made to return the way they had come when Even reached out to take his hand, tilting his head towards the back of the house. They walked into the long dark shadow cast by the house towards a gate at the end of the narrow side path and Even let go of Isak’s hand to reach up and over to release the latch. It opened into a small backyard bordered with a fence and shrubbery with a small patchwork stone path leading to a second gate set in the center of the fence towards the back. Even lead the way and they slipped through onto a path in what looks like a miniature forest, the moonlight lighting the wide path on either side of them.

Isak gaped at Even, “What is this?”

Even smiled, looking up into the sky while his dog excitedly shuffled around his feet, “This is actually a nature trail through a patch of greenbelt that our house backs onto. The path isn’t that long and loops out to a park two or three blocks up my street and back around to here. My dad built this gate in the fence so we wouldn’t have to walk over to the park to have access to the path. They don’t like me going this way at night but you’re with me so it should be safe”

Even looked over at Isak, his skin almost glowing in the moonlight, and winked.

Isak swallowed a lump in his throat, and not trusting his voice, offered Even his arm.

Even looped their arms again, like they had done earlier that evening, and they set off.

At first, they didn’t say anything, listening to each other’s breathing, and watching the dog rush ahead, his nose to the ground.

Their feet crunched loudly over the dried leaves and the tall, slim trees swayed and rustled in the light breeze. Isak loved camping and the outdoors but hadn’t had time to get out the way he preferred since before the summer so he was happily soaking up the fresh air and stillness when he remembered something, “Wasn’t I the one supposed to be putting in the Max effort here?”

Even didn’t reply right away and they walked around the bend in the path where it was slightly darker through the trees before he slipped his hand into Isak’s, “Can’t you just save whatever you didn’t use for next time?”

Isak laughed and shrugged, “I could. Does that mean there is for sure going to be a next time?”

Even scoffed, his long, icy fingers slowly warming in Isak’s grip, “Do you always ask this many questions?”

Isak smirked at him, “Do you always dodge answering them?”

They both paused and burst into laughter at the same time, startling the dog.

Isak noticed that they had stopped walking and urged them on with a tug on Even’s hand, “What’s your dog’s name?”

Even raised an eyebrow at him, “Now you ask. It’s Epson”

Isak smiled, “Almost like the salts? Or like the printer?”

Even shrugged, smiling a bit, “Like the therapy dog. Not like the salt or the printer”

Isak watched the little dog loop back to peer at them from under bushy white eyebrows before rushing off ahead again, “Really?”

Even shifted his hand in Isak’s grip, “When I first presented, I had a lot of conflicting instincts. It’s weird to go from casual about everything to worrying about things that had never even occurred to me before. My parents had me see some people to look at how to best organize my care needs while I transitioned and getting a dog was a suggestion meant to help me deal with the reflexes brought on by the hormones”

Isak listened quietly while his mind flipped through what he remembered about Omega tendencies, “So he was like a substitute kid?”

Even didn’t answer right away and Isak let the silence rest for a minute, realizing that Even may not have talked to that many people about what he’d been through with his transition.  He didn’t want Even to feel like a science fair project that Isak was curious about and he knew how to take a hint, “I didn’t have any pets growing up but I always wanted a dog. I like that they don’t seem to ask any questions but know how to make you feel better. That and the fact that they poop outside instead of in a box where you have to literally hunt for shit like you’re Tomb Raider”

Even’s laugh was loud in his ear because of how close they were standing and Isak let it roll over him, his inner Alpha puffing up a little bit.

They were coming up on the park, lit brightly around the edges by street lights, with benches around the perimeter. It was darkest in the park towards the center, obviously not needing to be well lit at night when the people most likely to use it were sleeping. Here, Even called Epson close and let him off leash where he immediately vaulted into the sand pit.

Isak made a face, “He’s going to be covered in sand”

Even shrugged, “I’m bathing him tonight. He was due anyway”

Isak nudged Even in the side, “Ok, Mom”

Even gave him a long look and dragged him to a bench where they sat, Even’s left side plastered to Isak’s right, “Is that weird to you? That I could basically be the male equivalent of a mom someday?”

Isak thought about it for a second, “Honesty, it’s just one more thing you can do that millions of other people on the planet can also do. And if you think about it in context, it’s more amazing than it is weird, right? Like biologically, you can do that. Think of how many people can’t have kids themselves; women with conditions affecting their capacity to conceive or carry to term. Having to go through extensive therapies like with IVF or having to adopt because they don’t have the natural reproductive choice that you and people with no overt barriers to conception have. And by extension, it’s your right by virtue of your biology. You can chose to be a parent or chose not to be. No one can say it’s unnatural if biology made it possible. Nature isn’t wrong; peoples’ unevolved mindsets is what’s wrong”

Isak realized that he was rambling, probably more energetically then the moment warranted, a second too late and chanced a side glance at Even.

Even was looking straight ahead, eyes suspiciously shiny in the low light, “You make it sound like a good thing. Like a great thing, even”

Isak shrugged, “It kind of is though, right? To have that option?”

Even smiled very slightly, “This is pretty deep conversation for a first date”

Isak grinned at him, “The best first dates are like that”

Even nodded, as if to himself, “Do you want to be a parent someday?”

Isak briefly thought about making a joke but didn’t. Even sounded like he wanted to know, “Honestly, I’ve never thought about _not_ having kids. I just don’t see where that’ll fit in the grand scheme of things yet. I’m still in school and I don’t know the future apart from the things that I can apply myself to trying to achieve. I mean, there are hundreds of possible scenarios, you know? I could die in a car accident on the way home from a ski trip and never live long enough to get to that point in my life. I might fall in love with someone that never loves me back and throw myself into work and achieve great things but never have a family. I might travel over the summer near the end of residency and fall in love with someone that I can’t start a family with. Who knows, right? I sometimes think that there are infinite universes out there and in every one, I could be slightly different, slightly right or left of center from the Isak that I am, and just different enough to make different choices than the me here in this universe. It’s chaotic to think about but that’s the kind of convoluted stuff I get into when I can’t read another paragraph or my head is pounding after I’ve proofread my paper for the fifth time and can’t tell if there are no more mistakes or if I’m just too tired to notice them anymore”

Even was looking at him with wide eyes and a slight smile, “That’s quite a complicated answer. But I don’t hate it”

Isak pretended to scoff in an offended way and leaned away from Even, turning to face him, “It’s my personal opinion; you don’t get a say”

Even smiled at the snark but looked a little sad too, “That alternate universe stuff is kind of scary when you put it like that, though. I don’t like it. The assumption that there isn’t any control; that I can’t decide. Doesn’t all that over thinking make you feel isolated? Like being trapped in your own head?”

Isak didn’t miss a beat, “I’m going to have to be honest and admit that I don’t understand what you mean? I think I probably spend a lot of time in my own head”

Even chewed his lip for a minute, “It probably doesn’t make you uncomfortable but I’ve had some…difficult experiences with thinking too hard or being trapped in my own thoughts too much. It’s kind of hard to explain…but it’s like being on a loop, and you keep thinking the same things and hearing the same things, and these are not the things you want to hear but you can’t get away from those things and you feel trapped but there is no way out and you…”

Isak knew there was more to it than that but he could also tell that Even was getting worked up a bit, and not in a good way. He reached over and cupped the back of Even’s head, startling Even into silence, and kissed him. Isak just rested there, his mouth on Even’s for a moment, the broke it slowly and leaned close enough to press his forehead to Even’s, “Let’s get you home, ok?”

This close, Even’s eyes were very big, “You think I’m weird”

It sounded more like a statement of fact then a question.

Isak shrugged, “Aren’t we all?”

Isak walked Even home and it seemed to take longer than the walk to the park had, even though he knew the distance was about the same. When they reached the gate back into Even’s backyard, Isak let Even pass through first, Epson trotting along behind. They were silent on the narrow stone path back to the house. At the side door, Even opened it just wide enough for Epson to steal inside, then he shut it quietly and leaned back against it, waiting.

Isak smiled at him, stepping into Even’s personal space, hands gently settling on Even’s hips over his jeans, “Want to do this again soon?”

Even didn’t answer right away, instead leaning in a little and pausing before closing the distance between them, lips settling on Isak’s as if asking permission. Isak slid his right hand up into the space between Even’s shoulder blades and pulled him closer, tilting his head and sealing his mouth over Even’s, slowly turning the chaste closed-mouth kiss into an open-mouthed one. Isak smiled into it when he felt the slight tremor go through Even and Isak slowed the kiss into gentle teasing and sucking open-mouth pecks that Even accepted with a soft sound.

Isak gently pulled away and felt the pit of his stomach get warm when Even tried to follow his mouth. Isak kissed his way across Even’s jaw to the spot just under his ear, his right hand sliding up into the long soft hair at the base of Even’s skull to tilt his head so he could nuzzle into the barely noticeable smooth bump of scent glands there, chasing Even’s scent down to the curve of where his neck met his shoulder.

Isak almost didn’t notice Even’s hand fisted in the front of his button up, but realized he should probably lay off some, hearing the quiet hitched breaths that Even was taking.

He kissed his way back up to Even’s ear, “I’m guessing that’s a yes?”

Even actually laughed a little, “Can I keep you?”

Isak leaned back enough to take in Even’s flush and big, searching eyes, then he leaned close enough to touch their noses together, “You can”

Isak slept a blissful, uninterrupted 6 hours later that night.

~!@!~

[Tuesday]

Isak is careful not to be too cheerful and obvious on Tuesday but Jonas still gives him a knowing look while Madhi and Sana chat and Magnus heads off to buy his lunch.

Isak dodges the weak attempt the boys make at being nosy about his date and prides himself on not slipping over the course of the lunch hour. They quickly get bored, moving on to chatting about other potential weekend plans and Magnus’ English test lit test that he seems doomed to fail. Isak doesn’t see Even around campus, but it’s a warm, tingling knowledge in his gut that Even is also going to his classes, also keeping their very new something special from his friends.

It’s near the end of his last class of the day that Isak gets a text from Even.

He’s carrying his and Sana’s heavy ass textbooks to her locker in the science department, as is their norm. He doesn’t notice the look Sana gives him while he fumbles to load both texts under one arm so he can text back on his phone.

**Even BN: Can I see you tmr?**

Isak grins from ear to ear and again misses the speculatively look on Sana’s face.

**IsakYaki: Where and when?**

**Even BN: You can pick. I trust you**

**IsakYaki: I write a few tests in the morning, but I’ll be free after 1. You?**

**Even BN: Classes start late on Wednesday for me. Done after 2.**

**IsakYaki: I can wait for you in the library. Know the sunroom by the History section on the second floor?**

**Even BN: Lived there all 1 st year. I know it**

Isak’s mother was away for another week on a retreat organized by the therapy support group she attended post-intensive therapy she had gone through in Isak’s last year of high-school. She went on these retreats often enough and told Isak he was welcome to crash in her apartment when she wasn’t there. Isak mostly only went there to visit her and rarely alone unless he really needed to hide from life for a bit but it would be the perfect place to hang out with Even for an afternoon.

His dad had been bugging him to come for dinner but he’d managed to postpone it until next week.  

**IsakYaki: Any good at Fifa?**

**Even BN: Not especially???**

**IsakYaki: Are you a real boy or no?**

**Even BN: You can check my equipment if you aren’t sure**

Isak chokes on air and laughs at the same time. He was typing a level 10 reply when Even beat him to it.

**Even BN: I’M JOKING**

**IsakYaki: You know I’m a health sciences major, right?? Like Anatomy and Physiology is my favorite subject???**

**Even BN: And?**

**IsakYaki: I could check out your equipment purely for scientific purposes. You could just show me…I wouldn’t have to touch**

**Even BN:…**

**Even BN:…**

**Even BN:…Why did I even make a joke like that with you. I did this to myself**

**IsakYaki: You kind of did. I enjoyed it; feel free to do it again**

**Even BN:…Have I told you that I can’t with you?**

**IsakYaki: You can. It’s like Nike says: Just do it**

**Even BN:…**

**Even BN: See you tomorrow Isak**

**IsakYaki: *Crying-tears smiley face***

When Isak finally looks up from his phone, Sana is standing impatiently by her open locker, “Some of us have lives to live Valtersen. Today please”

Isak quickly puts the books away and sheepishly follows Sana to the bust stop.

~!@!~

[Wednesday]

Isak had been studying in his spare moments since classes had started back in September and while he didn’t love sitting down for tests he was fairly confident in his ability to do well. Science was one of his best subjects and he didn’t have much trouble with the material. Still, he was glad when he collapsed in an empty, sunny seat in the sunroom to wait for Jonas that he was done all his exams for now.

Jonas was supposed to meet him for a short time between his own tests and a group presentation he had in the afternoon, and Isak planned to nap for a wee bit before he arrived.

He tucked his book bag under his chair and folded his jacket to use as a makeshift pillow under his head, shutting his eyes and soaking up the warmth of the sun.

There was quiet shuffling around him as a few other students arrived or left, but it was mainly pretty quiet. Isak wasn’t sure how long he relaxed, but he never quite fell all the way asleep, aware enough to hear the quiet steps of someone that had come to a stop next to him.

Isak didn’t bother opening his eyes, “That was fast. Did you fail?”

“What?”

Isak realized that it wasn’t Jonas and his head snapped up, his snapback tumbling to the ground, Emma leaning over to pick it up and handing it over to him gingerly, “Were you waiting for someone?”

Isak accepted his hat, setting it on top of his folded jacket instead of putting it back on, “I was waiting for a friend”

Emma nodded, smiling as she pulled the chair out next to his and sat, “I figured that”

Isak didn’t dislike Emma but he had a policy of trying to keep his relationships with most people has simple as he could keep them. He had a small circle of close friends and he found those difficult to manage on a good day so girls like Emma didn’t make the cut, no matter how much they wanted to. Isak had enough empathy to know that his understanding of what friendship entailed was a little strange but he’d learned the hard way that stretching himself too thin and trying too hard to accommodate other people at his expense didn’t usually end well. Some people could do it; Jonas seemed to know at least one person everywhere they went. Isak didn’t have the skill set or enthusiasm, but he also understood that sometimes you had to play the game to get your way.

Isak decided that if she didn’t know he wasn’t interested, he had to make it clear, and he had to do it in a way that would upset her the least, like pretending to ask for advice. Decided, he smiled at her slightly, “Hey, can I ask you a question?”

Emma’s eyes lit up and she nodded, “Sure”

Isak thought it over for a split second, “Ever had a crush on someone with no social media?”

Emma tilted her head, “You mean like Even?”

Isak almost gave himself away but recovered mentally, deciding to play dumb, “He doesn’t have any social media?”

Emma shrugged, “Like the bare minimum. I’ve worked with him for months and I still have to e-mail him using his school address to get in touch because he doesn’t even give out his phone number”

Isak shrugged, feigning nonchalance, “He must have a reason”

Emma looked thoughtful, “I guess so. I mean if what I heard about him is true, I’d have none either”

Isak glanced around them, noting that no one seemed close enough to listen in and he purposefully dropped his voice when he asked, “What do you mean?”

Emma looked around as conspiratorially as Isak had and shifted closer, also dropping her voice, “He’s really nice but I guess he used to be seriously fucked up? I heard Even had a huge breakdown in high-school. Tried to steal his best friend’s boyfriend and then tried to kill himself when he didn’t get his way”

For a split second, Isak is rational enough to remember that this is third-party word of mouth at best and that Emma may have no idea what she is talking about, but it’s like a switch is already flipped and he can feel himself freaking out.

Isak isn’t enough of a hypocrite to diminish the role he played in breaking up Jonas and Eva and even though they both seem to have forgiven him in their own way, he had always hated the part of himself that had done that. The part that was petty enough and jealous enough and cruel enough to interfere in something that was fine before he inserted himself where he shouldn’t have. And it made him extremely uncomfortable to think that Even was capable of anything similar.

Even who seemed kind and soft and sad in a way that meant he’d been hurt himself before.

Even who seemed so afraid of not having enough control that he didn’t seem capable of what Emma was implying.

But Isak was a realist: most rumors had some element of truth, not necessarily found in the telling. Rumors could get more warped and embellished with every chance it was passed along but the fact that it existed in the first place is what worried Isak. Even had been part of something in high-school, Isak had no doubt.

It was the how and why that worried him.

The whole no-social-media was suddenly starting to make a lot more sense. If he’d been involved in something awful he’d limit the number of ways people could get at him too. That time in high-school when Sana had run into trouble with bullying and social media was enough of a reminded how dangerous it could be when people wanted to use it to do mean things.

Isak sat up abruptly and Emma started, “What’s wrong?”

Isak didn’t really look at her as he grabbed his back pack and scooped up his jacket and hat, “I just remembered that I have somewhere to be. Thanks for keeping me company”

To anyone looking, Isak would look like he was running away from Emma. But Jonas was the only one who caught Isak’s expression as he brushed past him on his way out of the library, not even seeing Jonas because of where his head was at.

Jonas watched Isak disappear into the students milling around outside the library and decided that as soon as he was done his presentation, he’d hunt Isak down.

He hadn’t seen that stricken expression on Isak’s face since the time in high school when Isak’s mother had first been committed to hospital due to concerns with her mental health.

~!@!~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all. Hope people are still reading and enjoying this. I wrote a monster chapter (almost 45 pages) and had to crack it in two so I will post the 3rd and final part of Tongue-In-Cheek by the weekend (it needs proof reading).
> 
> Sorry about the long absence: got married on New Years Eve and got a puppy to keep Jaxon company. Been busy and the weather in Canada has been rude, especially lately. I hope this made sense as I could not proofread it any more to save my life.
> 
> ALSO: Gently point out any typos please, even if it will drive me nuts-_-


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